41. Can’t Drown Your Sorrows in Drink
JingYuan didn’t know how many times his heart shattered into pieces over the course of the night. YiHan’s words combined with the sight of a grovelling face on the boy he’d painstakingly protected since childhood caused his heart to crumble into pieces once more.
He carefully scooped his little one into his arms and gently kissed the other on the head. “Yes. I’m here to save you. From today onwards, I will never be angry with you. As long as I’m alive, I will never let anyone harm you ever again,” he sighed.
YiHan let out a chuckle before he shut his eyes tight and clung tight onto JingYuan’s thin waist. “I know,” he whispered. “I’m talking about my dreams. I want to sleep a bit more. Can you stay with me just a while longer…?”
JingYuan felt his gut and heart turn into ice. He hugged his boy back so hard it’s as if he was going to buy YiHan deep into his own flesh and bones. “Sleep. I won’t leave, even if you wake up. I’ll always be with you as long as you’re willing to let me,” he swore in a deep voice.
YiHan was exhausted. Surrounded by an embrace which made him feel safe, he slowly drifted off to sleep.
JingYuan unwaveringly maintained his position. It was only when the boy in his arms was soundly asleep did JingYuan cautiously carry the other up in his arms and softly placed him on the big bed.
Then, JingYuan turned around and searched the closet for a set of sleepwear. He gently changed the other into the new outfit. He spent the entire time trying hard not to look at YiHan’s snowy white body. Tried hard not to touch the other’s soft and tender skin.
JingYuan realised the self-control he was so very proud of had vanished without a trace when it came to YiHan. Even if YiHan wasn’t in the nude, just the sight of that pair of rosy lips set his body ablaze. He was so grateful the little guy didn’t ask him for help to shower. Otherwise, who knew what ruckus would occur?
Once YiHan was fully-dressed in his clean sleepwear, JingYuan was drenched in sweat. He lightly combed the flyaway hairs away from YiHan’s forehead. He stood there before the bed, staring down at the sleeping YiHan. His mind tumbling and rumbling away. He clenched his hands into tight fists, digging his nails into his palms. He forced himself to push away the impulse to kiss YiHan and vehemently turned away and marched to the door. As his hand reached out for the door knob, the paused. He had just promised the little one he’d stay with him. How can he leave while YiHan was asleep?
JingYuan heaved a sigh and turned back. He sat down at the chair by the desk and massaged his aching temples. Tonight’s barrage of incidents was hard for him to adapt to. The changes that’d happened to the boy made him furious and sad. He didn’t know why these changes appeared. He’d only been away for half a month. Why was his little prince in this state?
Beneath his dark gaze brewed a raging typhoon. If this was the fault of someone’s mischief, then that person had better pray he never figure out who they are. Once he knew who they were, he’ll pull the other down to hell or die trying!
He turned to look at the pitiful, small ball of YiHan curled up in bed and let out another heavy sigh. The frustration in his mind had no outlet, no escape. He reached out to the liquor bottles on the desk and took a deep gulp from them.
Time trickled by. The bottles on the table slowly emptied. JingYuan leaned his head against his palm, his elbow on the table. His mind was buzzing with thoughts he couldn’t understand or keep track of. Just then, he heard movement coming from the bed. He hurriedly tried to stand up and go to the other.
Dizziness overwhelmed JingYuan the moment he was fully upright. A bitter smile adorned his face. It looked like he really can’t drown his sorrows in drink. Every time he’d get hammered.
Worried about the little guy on the bed, he hastily strode over to the bed without even waiting for his vision to stop whirling. He stumbled over to find the little one restlessly mumbling about something. He leaned in close to listen. Ah. YiHan wanted to use the bathroom.
JingYuan didn’t know whether to cry or to smile. He shook the emotions out of his head, peeled the blanket away from YiHan and carefully scooped the other up into his arms and to the bathroom. Once in there, he had to hold the boy who refused to open his eyes upright with one arm while helping him pull down his pants with the other. He took a moment to steady himself and cautiously took hold of tiny YiHan. A soft semi-whistle rustled through his teeth. Gently, JingYuan coaxed YiHan into resolving certain bodily functions.
T/N:
This place in the story may be the worst place to talk about this, but here’s some advice: don’t act like JingYuan in his narration/thoughts, especially all the time. Thinking of your significant as little kiddies/babies who need your protection all the time is not healthy. It gives the impression you’re looking down on them. It’s fine if both parties have talked about it and are okay with it but know that it’s a sore topic due to the constant infantilisation issues women used to face. Men back then used the “you’re just a girl who needs my protection” excuse so much to stop women from gaining any independence or equal rights (it’s “too dangerous”/ “for your own good”). Don’t be the dick who sets red flags off then get defensive over it. For those who don’t understand just how bad it can be, I recommend:
The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman
A classic short story that’s about a woman who’s suffering from postpartum depression who spirals into insanity due to over-coddling and infantilisation.JingYuan’s a nice fantasy, but he’s not the best guy early in the story.
Shibb's Den 
YAAAAAASSSSS! Thank you for the chapter and even more thank you for the notes.
I always discuss this with my friends and there are a lot of people that don’t see how this type of thinking is bad, no matter of it’s in a light novel.
Thank youuuuuu!
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I guess im supposed to be like “oh nice jingyuan said hes gonna be there for him and not abandon him nice ml sugoi” but im kinda uhh because in first life he…did…kinda…leave? For whatever long and then yihan died? “Ill never leave u” but you did!!! You so did!!! I get it that yihan was going off the deep end but if things were slightly different you’d leave him alone with nobody with the power to look after him so every time jingyuan says these things i cant help but think yeahhhhh man your sincerity only goes so far…
Im not too sure what to think of this novel and ml i guess :thinking:
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Omg thank you for the note! I really want to cry so hard :((
Right, I mean he trying to made YiHan depend on him completely, but when YiHan didn’t behave like he wanted, he abandoned YiHan.
He even agreed with YiHan’s sister to using their marriage for ‘protecting’ his ‘little prince’. Dude, if you really love him just tell him? If you scared with the result then don’t make some excuse to justify your actions!
I’m still mad at him. I wish he knows about YiHan past life so he can feel the same pain as YiHan. I hope this can be a good lesson for him too.
(If this was the fault of someone’s mischief, then that person had better pray he never figure out who they are. Once he knew who they were, he’ll pull the other down to hell or die trying!)
Pfft… Let me tell you, the one who hurt YiHan the most was you! Now what will you do? 😡😡
Thank you for the update!
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Yeah, my opinion of MJY isn’t really on the positive side lol Maybe it’ll change with further chapter but it depends on his behaviour. And always that “my little prince”, dunno but I want to slap him every time he thinks that xDDD
Thx for the ch \(≧▽≦)/
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I fully support your point of view, from my perspective parents should give not only love to their children but the strength and confidence in themselves to face the problems and when leaving the protection they can spread their wings and fly freely, that goes too for couples
Thanks for the chapter! ^ ^
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Personally I like MJY, but only as a fantasy lol it’s weird how the relationships you like in novels and the ones you like for yourself are entirely different. Thanks for all the chapters!!
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All hail the T/N note! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧ Fantasy can be kinda ok when fantasy but the line needs to be drawn in reality. I’m really glad that you are the one translating the story ♥️
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And found a copy of the yellow wallpaper and chucking into list of read later when I have good and steady mental health 😁
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I agree with you point of view. As a career woman im independent and i hate when men treat me like a fragile little thing.
Thank you for the update
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Estoy con la traductora y además, ¿quién coño se pone a tomar cuando la otra parte está en tal estado? eso es irresponsabilidad, tanto él como esa familia quiero golpearlos, porque es cierto que que Han por malos consejos de otro llevó a la familia a la ruina… pero la cosa es que su familia ni siquiera averiguó ¿d´ónde quedó el amor en ese momento?, además luego esos vídeos, y para ellos él era capaz de tal cosa… ¿dónde quedó la familia y amigos que lo malcriaron?
No hay peor crimen que anular a una persona y ellos lo anularon como persona, lo menospreciaron con su “amor”
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JingYuan has a lot of issues,and I agree that demeaning someone (man or woman) isn’t right. It also doesn’t help that YiHan is depicted as useless without someone taking care of him.
I don’t understand the hatred for JingYuan though. People are acting like JY just left as soon as YiHan got angry,but this was after YEARS of unwarranted anger and meddling and pushing away. It is unbelievable if JY stayed, especially after YiHan cheapened JY’s feelings and propositioned JY. We haven’t even seen YiHan act as unruly as before, getting drunk,yelling at people,beating people, and being lazy. All we see is him trying to do better. Cut JingYuan some slack; he’s a good friend and ML.
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AHHHHH I love this damn novel I want to continue reading until I’ve caught up to the most recent updated chapter but then again I don’t…… these chapters will he the death of me.
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I actually do feel that women needs to be protected but not in an overly aggressive way. Though it’s just my opinion. As a woman, I don’t feel safe about a lot of things and I often ask for an escort when I go out or do something. It’s better to be safe you know?
You’d be fine the next but then you’d be kidnapped and sold on the black market. I know someone who was returning home from school but got kidnapped, in front of a highway which is scary. I understand if many others want to be independent and self-reliant though. I’m just more submissive and weak.
Love the translation btw❤❤❤ Thank you💃👌
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