161. You Have to Understand

YiHan and JingYuan scoured over the chat logs with Xu YouRan. After a thorough analysis, they’ve concluded that the man was interested in nothing but writing stories. He wasn’t materialistic nor did he want a grand quality of life. He also had quite a low emotional quotient. His personality was very reactive. He didn’t seem like the kind of person who’d throw caution to the wind, do anything and everything for love. The more YiHan got to know him, the more certain YiHan was that something fishy was going on with those crimes Xu YouRan was accused of.

Chen Hong was very efficient. By the third night, he arrived at their doorstep with Nan Shan’s file.

Nan Shan was the bastard son of Chu FangMing of the Chu family. While the Chu family can’t compete with the five great families in the city, they were considered one of the bigger clans. Chu FangMing was the second son of the family. As he married the daughter of the Qi family’s branch family, the Qi family helped him overthrow his older brother. In one swift move, Chu FangMing became the master of the house. Nan Shan’s mother was an orphan. Her name was Xu JinXuan. Her parents both passed away in a plane crash during a business trip. They left her with a house and a huge sum of insurance money. She was a talented student and majored in the arts. There was a sweet, elegant sort of beauty to her. She was a bright and intelligent woman, the kind that shone bright with every move. When Chu FangMing was a young man, he fell in love with her at first sight. He courted her with a passionate fervour. In the end, he won her over. He had his happy ending. Unfortunately, the good times didn’t last long. She, who craved for warmth, thought she was in a relationship aiming for marriage. However, Chu FangMing merely wanted a period of romance. This relationship would end with Chu FangMing marrying the Qi family’s daughter.

When the two broke up, Xu JinXuan drowned in despair. Then, she found out she was pregnant. She had planned on aborting this unwanted child but she desperately needed family then. She finally chose to give birth to the baby and that son was Nan Shan.

After the baby was born, Xu JinXuan named him Xu YouRan after a phrase from a classic poem, “leisurely meeting the Southern Mountain”. Because she was afraid Chu FangMing would find out about the boy, she decided not to publicise her newborn baby. The confinement lady she hired had a dubious character. JinXuan caught her secretly pinching YouRan hard, so she fired her. She didn’t bother hiring another confinement lady afterwards. In her confinement month, JinXuan had to take care of a baby all by herself. Combined with her depression, she fell ill. She didn’t care. Hence, when YouRan was still a little child, she was already in a terrible state of health. When he was fifteen years old, Xu JinXuan passed away.

Frankly, the woman was too naive. She thought she hid her child well but Chu FangMing knew of Xu YouRan’s existence early into the pregnancy. He just pretended not to as he was afraid of starting unwanted trouble. He was even prepared to turn the tables around and put the blame on her should she attempt to approach him with the child in tow. To his surprise, Xu JinXuan never once tried to seek him out, not even on her death bed. This made him frequently think of the beautiful and sensible young woman.

Xu YouRan inherited most of his looks from his mother. He was attractive but melancholy always hung around him. He didn’t like to talk much and he didn’t have any friends. He lived alone in the apartment his mother left to him. He began writing novels under the penname “Nan Shan” when he was still in university. After graduation, he began to work full-time on his novels. He rarely left his home. Xu YouRan’s life story was simple. One glance and everything could be understood. The only complicated issue in his life was his mysterious boyfriend. That man would frequently seek out YouRan but no one knew who that man was. All the investigators could find was they’ve been dating for a very long time. Their relationship started in YouRan’s university days.

“This mysterious man,” YiHan said, putting down the file, “is likely that married man.”

JingYuan leaned back against the back of the sofa as he peeled an orange. “The only thing we don’t know is if Nan Shan knows the other man is married.”

“How can he not?” YiHan asked. “Do you suspect he’s being lied to?”

JingYuan separated the oranges into little slices and carefully picked away the white pith. “It’s very likely,” he said as he handed YiHan a slice. “Look at how he lives his life. He’s an aloof man of little words. He’s always been alone. People like him are more likely to crave the warmth and love of another. Just like his mother. Someone just needs to appear and be slightly better to him than other people, spout a few lines of love, and he’ll easily fall into the trap. His personality is less proactive and more reactive. He never leaves his place unless it’s to buy what’s needed for him to survive. When the two meet, it’s always the other man who approaches him. If that man said he was single, do you think Nan Shan would believe him or not?”

YiHan finished his slice of orange and accepted another. He nodded and said, “You’re absolutely right. With how Nan Shan grew up, he would never have dated the other man if he knew that man was married. Now that I think of it, in the future, he’ll find out the boyfriend he thought he was mutually in love with was actually married for years. He would be referred to as the homewrecker. He’d be doxed and his reputation would be torn into shreds. Then, that man’s wife would appear in his home and humiliate him…

“How could he be able to handle such a series of attacks? No wonder he chose death.”

YiHan stuffed the rest of the orange into his mouth and gulped after a few haphazard chews. He then grabbed JingYuan’s hand and continued, “I can’t do this, Mu-Mu. My heart is so angry that it’s thumping hard. We cannot let Nan Shan suffer through that! I must protect my idol! Hand in hand, us husbands will be joined in stomping that scumbag to death!”

JingYuan ruffled YiHan’s hair in exasperation. He turned his hand to hold YiHan’s hand back and said, “Okay, we’ll stomp that scumbag but you have to chew properly before you swallow. You won’t risk choking then.”

“I have you, right?” YiHan said, sticking his tongue out at JingYuan. “I’m not scared.”

“What use would I be?” JingYuan asked. “I can’t choke on your behalf. You’d be the one suffering.”

“You’ll find a way to save me anyway!” YiHan insisted.

All JingYuan could reply to that was, “Okay, okay. I’ll have a way. I’d think of a plan.”

YiHan’s face went serious as he pumped his fist and said, “First, we must find out just who that man is, his identity and his family background. If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles!”

JingYuan chuckled. “Oh? You’ve learned how to use that proverb now. Don’t worry. I’ve already ordered Chen Hong to arrange some men to keep an eye on Nan Shan’s home every minute of the day. That man just needs to appear and we can get a photograph of him. Once we know who that person is, we can find out whether our hypothesis is correct. Only then can we plan the next step.”

Stuffing a slice of orange into YiHan’s mouth, JingYuan smiled and continued, “Leave this investigation to me. You have a mission too.”

YiHan sat up straight as his mouth furiously chewed.

“You are to get as close to Nan Shan as you can,” JingYuan said. “You are to support him in his times of need. He is lacking a friend. Once we find out who that man is and if our guess is correct, we’d need you to slowly guide him to realising the deception. Implicitly tell him to leave the other as soon as possible. He would certainly be hurt but we’ll do our best to reduce it to the minimum. We can only take care of that scumbag as we wish once Nan Shan has fully withdrawn from the situation. Of course, if we were wrong, you must advise him to let go of the relationship. That man has a wife yet wishes to date another man. There’s no way that man would be a good guy.”

YiHan gave a hard nod and solemnly swore, “Don’t worry. I promise I’ll complete the mission.”

“And one more important thing,” JingYuan solemnly said.

YiHan’s eyes gleamed up at JingYuan.

“Most importantly,” JingYuan said with a serious face, “support is only support. Comforting him must only be that. You can never ever let him fall in love with you! This is extremely crucial!”

YiHan was speechless. “Don’t worry. Your fiancée isn’t that alluring…”

“You are exceedingly wrong on that,” JingYuan said. “This is absolutely possible. Either way, you must be careful. If he ever leans towards that, I’ll personally strangle him to death.”

YiHan dropped his head into his free palm. “Do you think everyone is as blind as you are when it comes to finding their other half? You’re clearly the blossoming flower here yet you insist on planting yourself on crap…”

JingYuan let go of YiHan’s hand and looked deep into YiHan’s eyes. “I’ve read something before that is very appropriate as a response to your words. Even if I’m a blossoming flower, I am an old, wilting blossom; even if you’re crap, you’re the freshest, youngest crap there is. Anyway, flowers can only bloom better if they’re planted on dung. Nothing is a better combination than a flowering blossom and cow poop…”

YiHan didn’t know whether to laugh or cry but he was touched. “What are you saying? What’s with all that weird logic?”

JingYuan kissed YiHan on the lips and mumbled, “They’re not weird. They’re proper logic.”

YiHan’s mirthful eyes slowly slid shut and he opened his mouth without prompting.

A kiss later, JingYuan let out a quiet chuckle.

“What is it?” YiHan softly asked.

JingYuan licked his lips and laughed, “Tastes like oranges.”

YiHan blushed as his embarrassment turned into anger. “Well, I love oranges! My whole body stinks of oranges. I’ll suffocate you!”

JingYuan scooped YiHan up into his arms. As he walked to the bed, he nibbled on YiHan’s lips. “What a coincidence. I love oranges too. There’s a large orange here for me to eat. How nice.”

***

A night of passionate warring later, YiHan’s arms and legs were sore and his eyes were heavy. Those eyes remained closed throughout their morning routine as JingYuan dressed himself, cleaned them both up, and pack YiHan up to bring him along to the office. YiHan was even carried into the car by JingYuan. He had lost all dignity before the other people in the mansion. There was no fear of losing face at all. Getting out of the car was a different story. He still wanted to maintain a dignified image before the employees of Mu Group. He did his best to straighten his back and sulkily walked forward. The moment the elevator doors closed behind the couple, YiHan slumped over and tilted to the side. JingYuan caught him and held him up in his arms.

“If it hurts, why must you come?” JingYuan asked, heart aching. “You can rest for half a day at home. Once you’ve had enough sleep, I can go back and fetch you. Isn’t that nice?”

“You cruel thing,” YiHan griped. “I came all because you looked too pitiful when walking out the door all alone! How can you be so ungrateful?”

“How am I ungrateful?” JingYuan protested. “I’m so moved by it. I just feel bad for you.”

“I begged you for so long last night but you wouldn’t stop,” YiHan pouted. “You wouldn’t even slow down. Now you say you feel bad for me?”

A little laugh burst out of JingYuan. He then cleared his throat and said, “HanHan, that really can’t be slowed down or stopped. You have to understand.”

“What’s there to understand?” YiHan rolled his eyes and replied.

“I love you,” JingYuan wholeheartedly confessed. “I can’t stop myself at the sight of you, let alone in that kind of situation. Yo–”

The elevator doors were about to slide open so YiHan, face flushed red, slapped his hands across JingYuan’s mouth and exclaimed, “No more!”

Chen Hong lowered his head and stared at the floor. “Little Master Bai. Mr Mu,” he greeted.

Translator’s Note:

Confinement: This is referring to postpartum confinement. Despite Google’s labelling, this is not an archaic practice. Women who had just given birth are meant to stay indoors for a month after childbirth. There are various rules to it that’s related to Traditional Chinese Medicine logic. As women are often weakened during this recovery time, they’re advised to avoid any actions that might cause a cold, e.g. exposing oneself to cold winds and letting wet hair air dry instead of towelling/blow-drying their hair. This is also the time when the new mothers are fed protein-rich food and “heaty” food like ginger. Some of those special dishes are also considered helpful for breastmilk production.

◄Previous • Index• Next►

160. I’m Eager

JingYuan’s hand started a soft, rhythmic patting on YiHan’s back. “Yes, of course I will. I’m not so tyrannical as to stop you from making friends. You like his books. It’s normal for you to want to know him better. I’m not a dictator. As your future husband, I do trust you. HanHan, you are a free bird.”

YiHan buried his face into JingYuan’s abdomen. He then said in a muffled voice, “No. I don’t want freedom. I am yours. I am like Tripitaka and you are the circle Sun Wukong drew out. You can’t restrain me. I’m the one who doesn’t want to leave.”

JingYuan chuckled. “Little one, when did you learn how to sweet talk? You’ve turned me into a restraining circle. Okay. Being your circle has made life worth living. Come, let’s go eat. You must be hungry, right?”

YiHan clung onto JingYuan, unwilling to get off. As he was slowly shuffled along by JingYuan’s movements, he said, “It’s really not sweet talk. It’s the truth. Tell me. What do I do about Nan Shan? With you around, I don’t want to use my brain at all.”

“If you don’t want to use your brain, then don’t,” said JingYuan, dragging YiHan along with him out of the room. “This one is very willing to work on Your Majesty’s behalf.”

YiHan hummed and replied, “Teach me.”

“Right now, we have limited information on his personality, identity and true past,” said JingYuan. “As Sun Tzu wrote, ‘if you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles’. From what you’ve said, he is safe for now. Don’t act too hastily just yet. I’ll gather all I can on him and we’ll plan the next step then.”

“Mn, mn. Okay. I’ll go with what you said,” YiHan said, nodding.

“You said you bumped into him today?” JingYuan asked. “Did you two talk? How did it feel?”

“We exchanged a few words,” YiHan replied. “I was holding onto ‘The Blue Night’. That’s a famous work of his and the book he’s most proud of. He saw it when passing by so he stopped and chatted with me. However, he didn’t know that I knew who he was. He only told me he was a fan of the book too. I got his contact number, just in case I needed it. As for him, I had a really good first impression of him. His skin was pasty pale, the kind you see on people who rarely get exposed to sunlight. I could instantly tell he rarely left his home. He had a refreshing air to him, constantly giving the impression of a calm, melancholic yet ethereal person. There’s always a hint of a frown on his brows. He looked very much like those gloomy poets.”

“You did very well and your observations were detailed,” JingYuan said. “This is crucial to analysing his personality. How about this? Keep in contact with him for now. Don’t do it too often and don’t make it sound intentional, but you must frequently remind him of your existence. Let him get used to you in his life. Once I have further information on him, we can discuss what we should do.”

YiHan’s head bobbed up and down like a chicken pecking at the grains scattered across the ground. “My amazing, strong husband-to-be,” said YiHan, eyes squinting in a smile, “I just love how you look when you’re strategizing and planning.”

JingYuan dragged YiHan to the dining table and pushed him into his seat, “My smart, cunning husband-to-be, hurry up and eat. We have something to do later.”

YiHan paused in thought. “There’s nothing,” he said in confusion. “Do you have something planned?”

JingYuan blinked back at his fiancée and smiled. “Big Mu-Mu’s exercise. Eat up. Have some more.”

YiHan: “…” You’re making me unable to look at the nickname with a straight mind, okay?

After dinner, the couple returned to their room. They had just finished their showers and had yet to proceed with Big Mu-Mu’s exercise when they received a call from Qin Feng.

The other man didn’t waste any time. He went straight to the point. “YiHan, did you speak to Lil Fang? Said a few nice words about me?”

“Those aren’t really nice words,” YiHan replied, a hand towelling his hair dry. “I just told him what I thought. Well? Did Ah-Yi soften up a little?”

“Mn,” Qin Feng whispered, excitement audible in his voice. “When he made noodles just now, he made me a bowl too.” He paused for a moment and added, “He even gave me an egg.”

JingYuan walked over to YiHan, took the towel from the younger man, and helped YiHan dry his hair. The younger man looked up to flash JingYuan a smile before returning his attention to the phone.

“I see, that’s good,” YiHan said. “Ah-Yi might be a bit hard to approach but he has a soft heart. It’s only a matter of time when his heart gives in. This bowl of noodles shows you’re not far from victory.”

Qin Feng’s voice dropped lower as he chuckled, “I can see it. Right now, Lil Fang’s heart is not as cold as his face. I thought it’d be some time before anything happened but after a meeting with you, he’s visible softened. I guessed you had helped plead my case. Mere thanks are not enough for such a big favour. If you ever need me, just let me know.”

“It’s not that serious,” YiHan laughed. “A big favour? It was only a few words of truth. Anyway, your identity was revealed to Ah-Yi because you saved me. It’s been bugging me this whole time.”

“That incident was merely the spark,” the other man continued, voice still in a whisper. “Lil Fang and I will be spending many days together. Even if I hadn’t acted that day, he would find out sooner or later. It was only a matter of time. I had thought of finding a proper time to confess about it to him, a time when he’s in a good mood.”

“Is it not convenient for you to speak?” YiHan curiously asked. “Why are you whispering? If it’s not a good time, we can just hang up and talk another day.”

“I’m hiding in Lil Fang’s bathroom currently,” Qin Feng chuckled. “I’m afraid he’d overhear our call and think we’re plotting together against him. That’d be troublesome then. You have to explain to him that I have never ever asked you to help plead my case. I am true when it comes to him.”

“I’ve got it,” YiHan chuckled back. “Don’t worry. I’m hanging up. We can’t let him overhear us.”

“Okay,” Qin Feng responded.

Right before YiHan hung up, he added, “Qin Feng, Fang Yi is a naive man. Don’t hurt him or I won’t forgive you.”

“Don’t worry,” Qin Feng seriously replied, something rare for him. He thought for a moment before continuing, “Lil Fang is so lucky to have you as a friend. Bye then.”

YiHan hung up and turned to JingYuan. “Qin Feng said Fang Yi’s attitude to him has visibly softened. The man even cooked him a bowl of noodles. Qin Feng was so ecstatic that he hid in the bathroom to call me and say thanks.”

JingYuan gently massaged YiHan’s head as he replied, “That’s good. With Qin Feng’s protection, Fang Yi’s path ahead will be much smoother. He won’t have to trip over unnecessary rocks now.”

“I can see Qin Feng feels deeply for Fang Yi,” YiHan said, a hand on his chin. “If Fang Yi can really get together with him, it’s a good thing too. But if Fang Yi doesn’t want to, they’d be at it for some time, especially with Qin Feng’s personality. Fang Yi will also be in danger then.”

“There’s no need to worry,” JingYuan said. “I think Qin Feng isn’t the kind of thug to be rash and impulsive. Fang Yi should also feel something for him. From the looks of it, those two are most likely going to get together.”

YiHan nodded. “With your confirmation, I feel much more relaxed. Qin Feng is absolutely a fierce beast. If Fang Yi is with him, Fang Yi will definitely be the weaker party. I’m really worried he’d suffer.”

“The weaker party?” JingYuan asked with a laugh. “I don’t think so. There’s a very apt saying: the one who falls in love first loses. Qin Feng has lost at the very start. Between the two of them, Fang Yi might be at a better advantage.”

“True,” YiHan said. “Qin Feng is quite a groveller. Mn, that’s good.”

“Little one,” JingYuan chuckled, “you’re so brave. In this entire city, not even the old Mr Yan would dare explicitly threaten the head of the Hidden Dragon. You just said it straight to his face. Aren’t you afraid he’d take offence?”

“He didn’t,” YiHan said. “He even said we’re friends. So what if I threatened him? If he really hurt Fang Yi, I would really be picking a fight!”

“It’s very good that you’d fight for your friends,” JingYuan said, trying to hold a laugh in. “But your figure’s quite small. You want to fight Qin Feng? He could take you down with just one finger. Do you know what kind of training he’d been put through since he was a child? Don’t be fooled by his lanky looks. I dare say that in this entire city, no one is his match, not unless they come in a mob.”

“Who said I’d be fighting him physically?” YiHan rebuked. “Have you heard of using one’s brain? JingYuan, between us two, whenever I hear of Qin Feng’s father, I get so angry. A tiger may be cruel but it doesn’t eat its cubs, yet that man would dare treat his son so badly. He’s just inhumane.”

JingYuan placed the towel down and moved to sit beside YiHan. “What one person treasures is different to what another treasures. We think our emotions and mental state is more important. Qin HaiTian wanted power and wealth. If Qin Feng weren’t his only child, Qin Feng would never have a chance to grow up. He would never have a chance to avenge his mother. What comes around goes around. Qin HaiTian scoffed at emotions. In the end, he died in the hands of his own son. That counts as karma.”

YiHan sighed. “Qin Feng is a pitiful man too. If not for an extreme amount of hatred, who would be willing to kill their own father? Qin HaiTian was not fit to be a parent! He deserved to die.”

JingYuan stood up and grabbed the hairdryer from its place. He then carefully blew YiHan’s hair dry. “If Qin Feng hadn’t gotten Qin HaiTian for a father, he could have led a vastly different life. Actually, it’s easy to see. Feelings and relationships are important to him too, but he is the head of the Hidden Dragon. He also has a fearsome reputation. No one dared to get close to him so no one noticed it.”

“That might not be so,” YiHan said. “why else would so many people be willing to follow him and help him overthrow his father?”

JingYuan froze. He chuckled, “True. HanHan, you’re still the wiser of us two.”

YiHan smiled. “I won’t accept such sweet talk. Finish blowing my hair dry and let’s sleep.”

“Okay,” JingYuan said, letting out a sly smile. “I didn’t think you’d be so eager. Don’t worry. I’ll be done soon.”

A look at JingYuan’s face and YiHan knew the other man’s mind was filled to the brim with perverted thoughts. “I’m not eager,” YiHan helplessly said. “Please, take your time.”

JingYuan leaned in close and said, “I’m eager.” His deep voice vibrated through YiHan’s ear and deep into his bones.

YiHan: “…!!” (*/w\*) That’s against the rules!

***

YiHan added Xu YouRan into the fan group of Nan Shan’s books. The two men would occasionally chat with each other. Even through the internet, YiHan could tell the other man was rather depressed. Xu YouRan only appeared excited when they discussed his books’ plots. When it came to everything else, he was rather uninterested. His books were usually plot focused. Rarely did the novels feature romantic relationships. When YiHan, seemingly nonchalantly, steered the topic of their conversations to what they thought of romance, the other man’s views were quite pessimistic. The man either held no expectations of relationships or the man’s past relationships didn’t make him happy.

Translator’s Note:

1. Free Bird: Technically, the line is “you’re free” but that has a slightly different implied meaning.

2. Ah-Yi: Ah (阿), the typical character used for nicknames.

3. A tiger may be cruel but it doesn’t eat its cubs: Chinese idiom used to decry how cruel humans can be.

4. Qin HaiTian: The author wrote Qin LianHai here. Uncertain if it’s another impromptu name change. Qin HaiTian will be the name used for Qin Feng’s father, if his name ever pops up again.

◄Previous • Index• Next►

159. Let’s Save Them

Book in hand, YiHan sat down on a bench the developers had placed in the strip of grass by the curb. Suddenly, a pang of sadness hit him. Humans are helpless to life’s twists and turns. No matter one’s status and wealth, there was no way to make the dead come alive. Just like JingYuan in YiHan’s last life. It didn’t matter if he was in agony or lonely. It didn’t matter how much more money and power he accumulated, JingYuan could never meet up again with the dead YiHan. If YiHan hadn’t died then – even if he became a crippled or a dirty rag, as long as he still lived – would JingYuan feel better? But he died. Nothing could change that.

Xu YouRan wasn’t like YiHan. At least there were plenty of people who mourned for him. What about YiHan? He had no funeral, no family to send him off. Forever alone, he couldn’t even have a proper burial. No one would know where he was buried. Naturally, no one would pray or make offerings for him. Aah, he shouldn’t have died if it was possible.

Through the incident with Chen TianYang, YiHan knew his fate, his destiny, could be changed. If he reached out a helping hand, perhaps Xu YouRan didn’t need to die…

Leaning back against the bench, YiHan’s eyes stared blankly into the distance. He should get to know the real Xu YouRan, find out whether there was another side to the story, find out if his beloved author was truly that depraved.

A man walked past in front of him. He paid no heed to the other man. However, that man soon came back and sat beside him.

“The Blue Night?” the other man softly asked. “You like Nan Shan’s books?” The man’s voice was very pleasing to the ear. There was a hint of refined melancholy in it.

YiHan looked up and froze, shocked.

He couldn’t believe his eyes. There are infinite possibilities and coincidences in life, but sitting before him was a living, breathing Xu YouRan!

The man was handsome in a refreshing way, just like the warmth of spring air blowing through the winter snow. There was a smidge of melancholy hanging in his brows. It somehow made those who see him feel protective. YiHan had seen photos of him before but in-person, the person felt so much more alive and real. For a moment, YiHan blanked out.

The man stretched out a hand and waved it before YiHan’s eyes. “Friend, what is it?” he asked.

YiHan felt embarrassment rise in him. He felt a sense of helpless panic, the kind that happens when meeting one’s idol for the first time. However, YiHan was someone who spends every day with JingYuan, someone with an oppressive aura. He had built up a strong mind from that. (Although, JingYuan never did put on an oppressive aura around YiHan. Only a seductive aura.) YiHan did his best to take in a few deep breaths.

“Yes,” YiHan said, mustering up the strength to smile at the other man. “I’m a fan of his books. Do you also like his books?”

Clearly, Xu YouRan had a lot of patience for his fans. “Mn,” he replied with a gentle smile. “Sort of. I’ve read all of his books.”

“Me too,” YiHan said. “I have a complete collection of his works. Ah, so you’re his fan too? Since we have the same favourite author, we’re kind of friends. Why don’t we exchange contact information? We can inform each other if there are any new updates from him.” YiHan blinked and let out a sly smile. “Are you in the chat group for his friends? I can invite you in.”

“Okay,” Xu YouRan replied with another beautiful and serene smile.

***

When YiHan returned to the Mu family home, YiHan excitedly searched around for JingYuan. Unfortunately, the man wasn’t home yet. Thus, book in hand, YiHan settled in and waited for his lover on the sofa. While he waited, he logged onto his QQ account on his phone and began chatting with his idol. When the sky grew dark, JingYuan returned.

The moment YiHan heard the door clack open, he leapt out of his seat and pounced on the man. JingYuan opened the door to be welcomed with an armful of YiHan.

“Be careful,” JingYuan said with a helpless little smile. “You’re an adult. Why do you still act like a kid?” He then carefully scanned YiHan’s face. “What has made you so happy?” he asked with a smile.

“Mu-Mu!” YiHan said, eyes squinting as he grinned. “I have to tell you. I met my idol today!”

“Idol?” JingYuan asked with a frown.

YiHan raised the book in his hand and showed it to JingYuan. “Nan Shan!”

After shooting a glance at the book, JingYuan said, “Oh, I know him. You’ve collected a lot of his books. You’ve met the author himself today? He lives in this city too?”

“I don’t have a lot of his books. I have all of them. All of them!” YiHan corrected. “He lives in Elegant Gardens in this city! I bumped into him today!”

“Elegant Gardens?” JingYuan asked, frown back on his face. “That’s not on the way to Zhang Su’s bookstore, right? Why are you over there?”

YiHan looked around them and pulled JingYuan by the hand up the stairs and into their room. He swiftly shut the door behind them. The whole time, he looked so secretive.

“What is it?” JingYuan sighed. “Why so mysterious?”

YiHan pulled him down on the sofa in their room and whispered, “Do you remember the dream I told you?”

JingYuan’s heart went cold. “Of course I do,” he said with a nod.

“There’s something I haven’t told you about. It doesn’t have anything to do with us.” YiHan then waved the book in his hand and continued, “It’s about this author, my idol, Nan Shan.”

“Tell me.”

“Nan Shan’s real name is Xu YouRan,” YiHan solemnly said. “In…the dream, he died too. He died about six months before I did. He was exposed as a homewrecker who seduced a married man. The entire situation escalated hard and then he was doxed as well. Things pushed him to commit suicide. I was so upset over it at that time. He’s really talented. From his books, I could tell he had a righteous moral compass carved into his bones. There’s no way I’d believe he’d be a homewrecker. Plus, the man he apparently seduced never even showed his face once. There wasn’t even anything anyone knew of him. Three days before Nan Shan jumped off his balcony, the other man’s wife barged into his apartment with some men. No one knew what happened and no one knew anything of the wife. There wasn’t a single piece of public information on who the married couple were. They were the start and end of the story that killed off Nan Shan. No matter what, it felt shady to me. I am Nan Shan’s fan. His death was so upsetting. It’s such a pity. However, in that dream, I was in a tough situation myself. I had no power to seek out the truth. Many of the events in my dreams have happened in reality too. You’ve said the dream was a warning. Then, if we don’t do anything, would Nan Shan really be pushed to suicide?”

“According to Tao Qi’s appearance and story,” JingYuan said, “and your dream, this incident really might happen. Just like the matter with Chen TianYang. Without your interference, he would’ve died back there. Was the sudden urge to get Jiang Hua to look into XueQing’s suitors, and the mad dash out when you found out about the man, also because of this dream?”

YiHan nodded and sprawled out over JingYuan’s lap. His mood visibly dipped. “When I saw Nan Shan’s book today, I was reminded of his death. I followed the address I remembered from the dream and I really bumped into him. Mu-Mu, he’s my idol. I like his books. I don’t want him to die. I want to read more of his writing.”

JingYuan stroked YiHan’s hair. “I know the kind of person you are, HanHan. If we just let things be and something did happen to Xu YouRan, you would feel uneasy. Go. Do what you want to do. As I’ve said before, you and I are forever on the same team. Let’s look into the truth together. Even if he truly is a homewrecker, it’s not a crime he deserves to die for. We’ll save him. Alright?”

YiHan sat up and hugged JingYuan around the neck. “Big Mu-Mu, why are you so nice to me? I feel like I love you more than I did yesterday.”

JingYuan hugged back. His fingers massaged the back of YiHan’s neck as he said, “You’re still calling me Big Mu-Mu? Are you thinking of that again?”

The younger man instantly bounced to his feet. He raised his hands in the air as he hurriedly said, “No. No, I absolutely did not mean that. It was just an expression of my respect and love for you. Please do not misunderstand me.”

JingYuan grabbed YiHan by the hands and pushed him back down on the sofa. “It’s just a joke,” he chuckled. “Look at how scared you are. Am I that scary?”

YiHan blinked and smiled back. “You’re not scary but I really want to eat a proper meal. I don’t want to have to gingerly sit on my chair. Going to sleep right after doing it in the best. From now on, we cannot do it before dinner.”

JingYuan let out another chuckle and gave YiHan a hard kiss. “Sure. From now on, we won’t do it before dinner. Doing it after dinner can also help with digestion.”

YiHan sighed and seriously replied, “Mr Mu JingYuan, you are truly getting more and more improper.”

JingYuan rubbed his forehead against YiHan’s and softly said, “This is a secret only you know in this whole wide world. You must know that I’ve always been extremely proper when I’m interacting with anyone else but you. Say, to avoid letting the world know of my true persona, should I consider eliminating all loose ends?”

YiHan was so entranced by JingYuan’s actions that it felt like his heart had died right then and there. He valiantly tilted his head up and kissed JingYuan on the cheek before huffing, “There’s no need to eliminate the loose end. You just need to seal his mouth shut.”

“Okay,” JingYuan huffed back as he slowly closed in on YiHan. “I’ll do as you say. I’m here to seal your mouth shut.” Saying so, he gently kissed YiHan on the lips and the two men exchanged a languid and tender kiss.

JingYuan then let go of YiHan and pulled the younger man into his embrace. “What’s your plan about Nan Shan?”

“I have no plans,” YiHan said, frustrated. “I really don’t know how I should get close to him.”

“That’ll depend on you,” JingYuan replied, resting his chin on YiHan’s head. “If you just want to save him, you don’t need to befriend him. You can just do your thing form the shadows and help him avoid death. If you wish to be friends with him, then that’s another topic.”

YiHan looked up and poked JingYuan’s chin up higher with a slim finger. “Mr Mu, if I say I want to be friends with him, I’m afraid you’ll die of jealousy. So, let’s forget about it.”

“Since you’ve said that,” JingYuan seriously replied, “won’t I be admitting I’m jealousy incarnate if I say that I’d be jealous? Don’t think I don’t know what you people say behind my back.”

YiHan burst out in a chuckle and said, “No, no. I didn’t mean that. I just don’t want you to be unhappy. I may have family and friends but no one can compare to you.”

JingYuan tweaked YiHan’s nose and laughingly scolded, “How dare you. You’ve learned to cover your verbal traps in pretty words.”

YiHan pulled the other man’s hand away from his nose and sprawled back over JingYuan’s lap. “Would you accept it then?” he laughed.

◄Previous • Index• Next►

158. Nan Shan

Yan Hui didn’t think a simple sentence spoken to fill the void would lead his lover’s anger to him. His demure and scholarly lover was now so furious that he could swear at Yan Hui. The man instantly knew his lover was serious in his rebuke.

“No, no,” Hui hurriedly pleaded for forgiveness. “I didn’t mean to say anything bad about him. I was merely commenting on how he’d matured. As for reputations, I just listen and forget about it. To properly know someone is to judge the other’s behaviours with our own eyes and not base our judgement solely on reputation. He’s actually not bad. Pei-Pei wouldn’t lose anything by being friends with him. Just as you said, he’s a pure young man. The social circles we move in may seem glamorous but it’s murky and dark. Such a man is more precious than gold. He’s an extremely rare find.”

“So Pei-Pei can be friends with him,” Zhang Su languidly said, “but I can’t?”

Hui gave a grovelling smile. “Of course you can. It’s your freedom who you befriend. How can I interfere with that? I know you think of him as a friend already and he seems to respect you a lot. It’s common knowledge among our circles that Little Master Bai despises waking up early. It’s such an honour and grand gesture for him to wake up bright and early just to attend your reopening party.”

The other man glanced at the flower bouquet placed beside them. It had a card with the words “A Gift From Bai YiHan” written on it.

“You wouldn’t interfere?” Zhang Su said with a chuckle. “Don’t think I don’t know how you secretly stopped Pei-Pei from getting close to me. What? Are you afraid I’ll teach your little sister bad behaviour?”

“Oh, you,” Hui softly said in exasperation. “I was afraid she’d teach you bad things. My dearest, I know. I was wrong. I went overboard last night. I’ve apologised already. Please calm down?”

The other man’s face flushed red as he coldly retorted, “We are in public! What are you rambling about?”

“Look at you,” Yan Hui whimpered. “From the moment we woke up, you’ve been barking back at me for every word I utter. You’re so angry and you’re filled to the brim with contempt for me. I feel so sad.”

At that, Zhang Su didn’t care if they were in public. “You’re sad?” he harshly whispered through gritted teeth. “Can you be any more shameless? You knew my shop had an opening party today yet you kept on until late into the night. No matter how much I begged, you just wouldn’t stop…” He paused. “Have you ever considered my feelings?”

Hui looked at his lover. The other man’s face was a sickly pale white. Hui’s heart ached as regret crept into his mind.

“Uncle,” Hui cried, face twisted in sorrow. “I was wrong. I had a few drinks last night. I wasn’t fully there, that’s why I lost control. I promise I’ll never touch alcohol again.”

“Never?” the unamused man coldly huffed. “Do you think I’m a fool?”

Hui tapped himself on the head. “That wasn’t right. It is rather hard for me to never drink again. After all, there are some business meetings I can’t refuse. However, I can promise that I’ll never enter your room again if I even take a sip of alcohol. Then, even if I go to you, I won’t touch you! How about it? See, the greatest punishment to me is being unable to see you. Forgive me this time?”

The furious man let out another cold huff and kept quiet. Hui wiped the beads of sweat off his brow.

“I know you don’t feel well,” Hui whispered. “Why don’t you head inside first and take a seat? I’ll help you welcome your customers.”

“How rare for you to know that I’m not feeling well,” Zhang Su finally replied. “But it’s fine. This shop is mine. It’s not right for me to slack off today. If you’re tired, you can head in.”

“I didn’t say I’m tired,” Hui said with a slight whine. “I’m just scared you’re hurting. I’m really sorry. I truly understand it’s my fault. I regret it too. It hurts more for me to see you hurt than for me to be hurt.”

The other man gave Hui the side-eye. “Are you trying to create a poem with that repetition?”

“Why wouldn’t you trust me?” Hui worriedly said. “I’m your lover. Would my heart not ache for you? If you’re truly angry, I’ll let you do the same to me!”

Zhang Su’s eyes shone bright. “For real?” he asked, head snapping to look at the other man.

“What did I say?” Hui asked, confused.

By now, there was a green gleam hiding in Zhang Su’s eyes. “Don’t think you can pull the wool over my eyes. I heard it loud and clear. Remember your words! I despise people who don’t keep their words the most!”

Hui’s mouth gaped wide open. His tongue was tied. What was said couldn’t be taken back again, just like spilled milk. He can’t be the kind of person his lover “hated the most”. Hui’s mouth opened and closed for a long time. In the end, all he could do was sigh. He was visibly wilted.

In contrast, his lover’s begrudging aura had disappeared into thin air. Zhang Su was as cheerful as a lark. Hui watched Su for a few moments before finally letting out a defeated smile. Forget it, he thought to himself. Look at how happy the other man was. Even if it was just for these few moments of joy, it would be worth it.

Meanwhile, Yan Pei had led YiHan around, showing him everything there was to see in the shop.

“Look, YiHan,” said Pei. She had been chattering non-stop since their tour started. “This section is mainly for educational materials. Here is where the books on finance are kept. This section is for books on healthy living and hobbies. Now, this is my favourite part of the shop. It’s mainly a section for stories and comics. Zhang-ge’s bookshop has everything you could ever need. He has most of the popular books. There are tables and chairs by the window for those who are here to read. Drinks and snacks would be provided to those who ask for it.”

“Are the books free to read?” YiHan asked.

Pei blinked back at him before slyly replying, “It’s free to read here but you must be careful. The book must be returned in perfect condition and they can’t be brought out of the shop. However, we do charge for drinks and snacks.”

“Oh, I see,” YiHan said with a nod.

He walked over to the section for novels and began to browse the shelves. His slender finger drifted past rows of book spines before finally stopping at a novel. It was titled “The Blue Night”. His finger stroked down the book’s spine as his eyes registered the name. Then, he carefully plucked it out from its place on the shelf.

Pei craned her neck to see what book YiHan had picked out. “YiHan,” she excitedly cried out, “you like Nan Shan’s books too? I’m also his fan!”

YiHan looked down at the name “Nan Shan” printed on the book’s cover as its author and let out a little sigh. He knew this “Nan Shan”. In his last life, that is.

Nan Shan, Southern Mountain, is just the author’s pen name. His real name was Xu YouRan. He’s a well-known author who gained his fame mostly from writing detective stories. He might be extremely famous but he didn’t write a lot. Even so, every one of his books sold like hotcakes. Unfortunately, he died at a very young age. He died about 6 months before YiHan did. Perhaps the gods were jealous of his genius. The man was only 28 years old when he passed away and the man died in quite a horrible manner. One could say he died humiliated without an ounce of dignity. He had committed suicide. He jumped from the 24th floor of a tall building. When his corpse was found, nothing was left whole. The photo of his body was just a bloody red block of mosaic. What a shame no one pitied him. His die-hard fans had secretly organised a simple remembrance ceremony for him. When it was discovered, people rabidly trashed the whole place. The entire ceremony devolved into chaos while photos of Xu YouRan before his death were thrown on the ground and stomped on. Marked by countless footprints and glass shards, the once-handsome face was rendered ragged.

YiHan really liked his books. Despite being in a rather tough situation himself, YiHan was still dejected when he heard about the other’s death. As for why Xu YouRan was held in such contempt, that was because he’d been found out to be a homosexual. Not only that, he had seduced a married man. He was considered a homewrecker. Many people were disgusted. As he was somewhat of a public figure, the situation escalated. At first, it was just verbal harassment. The keyboard warriors’ fingers flew across their keyboards. Then, somehow, he was doxed. Someone leaked his real identity. Images of the man were plastered all over the internet. Things turned into physical harassment. Someone was fanning the flames, constantly agitating the masses. It had gotten so bad that whenever Xu YouRan stepped out of his apartment, he’d be beaten up. His front door was always covered in degrading graffiti. The married man’s wife even barged into his home with a few of her men. No one knew what happened that day. All anyone knew was that Xu YouRan decided to jump from his balcony three days later. He didn’t have to deal with the humiliation and pointing. As for the “lover”, the man had never once shown his face. No one knew who the man was.

YiHan spaced out, staring down at the familiar book in his hands. It was a book he’d reread multiple times. Pei called out to him several times but his mind didn’t react to it.

“Hey, YiHan,” Pei said, nudging him in bemusement. “Earth to YiHan! What is it?”

Snapping back to his sense, YiHan’s fingers slowly stroked the book in his hands as he smiled at Pei and said, “I’m also his…his fan. What a pity we don’t know anything about him in real life. I really want to know the true him.”

Pei dropped her chin into her open hands. “Who doesn’t? What you just said is what every fan of his wishes. Unfortunately, no one knows his real identity.”

“Perhaps it’s better we don’t know,” YiHan softly sighed. “It is a type of protection for him.”

“True,” Pei said, nodding. “As his fan, we just need to support his works. He is a writer, after all. He’s not an idol. Haha.”

YiHan nodded. His fingers continued stroking the book’s cover. He actually knew Xu YouRan’s address. After all, it was all leaked online. While he couldn’t do anything back then, he remembered the man’s address. From the start of everything until now, he still believed Xu YouRan wasn’t the kind of man they say he was. YiHan could tell from the man’s writing. Anyone who can write such beautiful and intricate stories would never be a homewrecker. Maybe there was another story hiding deeper within. Anyway, when everything escalated then, it wasn’t that hard to find out the source of all the hatred. Many people hypothesised it was the man’s wife behind it all. However, since she had the moral high ground, no one said anything bad about her actions.

When it was time to leave, YiHan took the book with him. Sitting in his car, his fingers continued their slow strokes across the book’s cover.

“Pan Wen,” YiHan said, “please take me to ‘Elegant Gardens’ first.” Xu YouRan’s home address was in a place called Elegant Gardens. It’s an average and average district of the city that wasn’t freshly built nor was it an old residential area.

Pan Wen hummed in response. With practised hands, the car was smoothly turned towards the new destination. When they arrived, YiHan got out with the book still in his hands while Pan Wen waited in the car. YiHan then slipped past the guards by following a middle-aged woman with a big basket full of her groceries. He didn’t know what he could be doing here or what he can do for Xu YouRan. Did he want to befriend the man and get close to him? Then, find out the true story? He didn’t even know who’s right and who’s wrong. What does the truth matter? All YiHan knew was that YouRan must not be forced to death, even if his crime was real. The man was still young. He was so talented. He shouldn’t die in what should’ve been the prime of his life, just like…YiHan.

One by one, YiHan searched through the rows of towers until he found the building Xu YouRan lived in. Perhaps the man was writing down a draft of his next book. Perhaps he was sleeping after staying up late last night from writing. No matter what the man was doing, it was good. The man was still alive and not just a censored, bloody blob.

◄Previous • Index• Next►

157. Can’t Eat Spicy Food

JingYuan sat down on the sofa of the living room and patted the seat beside him. “HanHan, come sit here. What does that girl want with you now?”

YiHan smiled and sat down by JingYuan. “Zhang Su’s bookshop has been expanded. He’d bought the two neighbouring shop lots and combined them all. The renovation’s all done now. The reopening day is tomorrow. I’ll be visiting for a ‘shop-warming’ gathering. Pei-Pei was afraid I’d forget so she called. Thank goodness for her reminder. I thought it was the day after tomorrow. If not for her call, I’d have missed out.”

JingYuan hummed. “Zhang Su is a nice man. It’d be good for you to interact more with him. However,” JingYuan paused, “are you and Yan Pei close? You called her Pei-Pei. What an affectionate nickname.”

YiHan dropped his head into his palm as he sighed, “I only think of her as a younger sister. It’s just a nickname. You mind that too? Do your subordinates know how petty you can be?”

“You had never given me a nickname that cutely repeated one of my characters. You were never that affectionate,” JingYuan solemnly stated. “It took a lot of effort to make you just call me by my name. Yan Pei did nothing yet you called her Pei-Pei without prompting.”

YiHan stared at the other man, mouth gaping wide in shock. “What would you like me to call you then? Jing-Jing? Yuan-Yuan? Doesn’t it make your skin crawl? It doesn’t roll off the tongue quite as well.”

JingYuan shifted to look straight into YiHan’s eyes. His face remained serious as he said, “How can a nickname from a lover make my skin crawl?”

YiHan’s head dropped back into his palm. “Just how did we get on this topic? JingYuan, putting aside how it makes my skin crawl, if I truly call you Jing-Jing or Yuan-Yuan and if the world knows of it, I’m afraid the Mu Group’s stock prices will plummet.”

JingYuan twisted his head to look away. His posture straightened as he deeply said, “If you’re not willing to, I don’t intend on forcing you to do it. It’s quite undignified for me to ask this of my fiancée. If I stubbornly insist on it, I’d be so tragically pitiful.”

For some unknown reason, YiHan actually fell for JingYuan’s ploy this time. In a sudden show of his manly boyfriend nature, YiHan turned JingYuan’s head back to look at him. Ignoring the weak and imperceptible “struggling”, YiHan kissed JingYuan on the lips.

“I didn’t say I’m unwilling,” YiHan said. “Don’t put words in my mouth. I never gave you a childish nickname like that because I respect you. I’m afraid you’d be upset. After all, if anyone else heard it, it might destroy your reputation. Just a little bit, maybe. But if you don’t mind it, I’ll think about it. I want a unique nickname for you that only I can address you by. Okay?”

JingYuan cleared his throat and replied, “It is your right to have a unique nickname for me. I am your future husband. Why would I say no to something so trivial? Have your ponder.”

YiHan sprawled across JingYuan’s lap. His arms wrapped around the other man’s waist as he went quiet, lost in his thoughts.

“Mu-Mu!” YiHan excitedly gasped. “Mu, as in the character for ‘wood’. It’s a homonym of your surname and it’s easy to say. This is my unique nickname for you. How about it?”

Slender fingers combed through YiHan’s hair as JingYuan calmly replied, “As long as you’re happy. I have no comments.”

“My Big Mu-Mu,” YiHan smiled up at him, “why are you so nice?”

JingYuan roughly ruffled YiHan’s hair as he angrily said, “If it’s Mu-Mu, then call me Mu-Mu. What the heck is this Big Mu-Mu?”

YiHan rubbed at his nose and glanced down at JingYuan’s crotch region as he giggled, “Big Mu-Mu means a big Mu-Mu. You know.”

The other man’s ears were flushed red as he stroke YiHan’s chin and said, “That’s enough out of you. The sun is still up. Why are you so improper?”

YiHan turned to face away from JingYuan and hopped out of the man’s lap to stand a few steps away from the sofa. “Just who is the improper one here? Did I say anything? You’re the one whose mind fell into the gutter. Is that my fault?”

JingYuan’s anger, laced with embarrassment, led the man to leap to his feet and reach out to grab YiHan. The younger man scrammed the instant JingYuan got to his feet. YiHan scrambled up the stairs but JingYuan’s legs were longer than his. With a few large strides, skipping a few steps along the way, JingYuan caught up to YiHan. Just as the older man reached out for him, YiHan darted into their room and slammed the door shut. He swiftly locked the door and guffawed.

“Trying to catch me?” YiHan laughed. “Are you as agile as I am?”

No one replied. YiHan leaned into the door and placed his ear against the wood. Nothing still.

“Did I make him sulk in anger?” YiHan mused. “No way. I’ve got it. He must be trying to fool me into opening the door. Dream on.”

YiHan straightened up. He’d only taken two steps away from the door when he heard a soft clack coming from behind him. His body froze as his head stiffly turned to look behind him.

JingYuan had opened the door and was walking into the room. The man jiggled the key in his hand as he smiled. “My cute, naive fiancée, don’t you know there’s something in this world called a backup key?”

YiHan slowly retreated as he apologetically chuckled back, “My strong and mighty fiancée, spare this puny one just once?”

With a swipe of JingYuan’s foot, the door closed shut. The man walked closer and closer. “That won’t do. After all, you did say I am ‘Big’ Mu-Mu. As your betrothed, I must respond to your words and show you the strength of ‘Big’ Mu-Mu.”

By now, YiHan had retreated to the bed in the room. The bedframe bumped against his calves, making him trip backwards to sit on the bed. “I’ve already witnessed the might of Big Mu-Mu. Well, erm, I’m hungry. What are we having for dinner?”

JingYuan pushed YiHan back against the bed. Kneeling with one knee on the bed, JingYuan hovered over YiHan. “It’s still too early for dinner. You can have some afternoon tea first…”

Upon realising his pleas were futile, YiHan’s brows furrowed as he barked, “What are you doing? It’s still daytime! Are you trying to let the whole world know we’re having sex? You’re shameless!”

Dipping his head down, JingYuan sealed the nattering mouth shut with a kiss. The couple’s breaths mingled together. After a few whines from YiHan to signify his protest, YiHan eventually opened his teeth to welcome JingYuan’s invading tongue. YiHan’s hands snaked up to wrap around the other’s neck…

By the time they were done, it was dark out and YiHan had lost all desire to head down for dinner. All he wanted to do was nod off to sleep right then and there. JingYuan washed him up and did his best to coax the younger man awake but YiHan just didn’t want to open his eyes.

JingYuan could do nothing but help YiHan into his clothes and carry him down to the dinner table. When Ms Liu noticed the couple had left their room, she quickly set the table and carried the food out of the kitchen. If there were no witnesses around, YiHan would’ve happily continued playing dead in JingYuan’s arms. However, Ms Liu was there now. His skin wasn’t thick enough that he could keep lazing around in his lover’s embrace. YiHan hopped to his feet and walked over to the dining table, trying his best to not let anyone notice he was limping. When YiHan sat down, his face twisted in discomfort and he shot a glare at JingYuan. The older man gently smiled back and sat next to YiHan. JingYuan then slid his left arm around YiHan’s back to massage at the man’s waist. His right arm was then occupied with grabbing food from the serving dishes and placing them into YiHan’s bowl.

YiHan silently ate whatever he was given. Then, he turned to JingYuan and deliberately placed a slice of raw ginger in the other man’s bowl.

“Ginger can warm you up. It’s good for you. Have some,” YiHan gleefully said.

JingYuan gave YiHan an exasperated glance but he still raised the ginger slice to his mouth. YiHan hurriedly stopped him, blocking the ginger slice with his own chopsticks.

“Are you a fool?” YiHan angrily asked. “You were really going to eat it? This thing tastes so bad and its taste lingers in the mouth for so long.”

At this very moment, JingYuan’s usual dark eyes could be seen gleaming as bright as the stars. He happily said, “I just knew you couldn’t bear to make me eat it.”

YiHan gave him the side-eye. “What if I hadn’t stopped you?”

JingYuan shrugged. “I won’t die from eating a slice of raw ginger. It’ll just taste bad. “

YiHan’s chopsticks grabbed the ginger slice from JingYuan’s and threw it on the table. “I should’ve let you eat it,” he fumed, “and die from the spiciness!”

JingYuan leaned in to whisper in YiHan’s ear, “I’m fine with eating spicy food but you absolutely cannot right now. You’ll suffer.”

YiHan’s face was as red as a tomato as he angrily barked, “Go away!”

****

Early the next morning, YiHan arrived at Zhang Su’s bookshop. He had wanted to drive himself but JingYuan adamantly refused to let him do so. YiHan knew the other man was just terrified from how YiHan had crashed his car to save TianYang. Ando, the younger man didn’t insist on driving and obediently let his lover arrange for a driver. The driver’s someone he knew too – the brawny Barbie, Pan Wen.

When YiHan stepped through the door of the bookshop, the entrance was packed with chattering crowds. Pei was smiling brightly near the door while Yan Hui and Zhang Su were standing next to each other. The place was filled with plenty of teenagers in uniforms. As for people who were from YiHan’s and Pei’s social ranks? There weren’t many. Merely a few sprinkled here and there, and all of them blended in well with the crowd.

“YiHan, you’re here early,” Pei cheerfully greeted when she spotted him. “I thought you wouldn’t be up so early.”

“It’s the grand opening of Zhang-ge’s bookshop,” YiHan replied with a smile. “I wouldn’t dare to laze in bed. Did you receive my bouquet?”

Yan Hui reached out his hand for a handshake as he smiled and said, “We’ve received it first thing in the morning. Thank you so much, Little Master Bai, for honouring my husband so.”

 YiHan shook the man’s hand. “We’re all friends. No need to be so formal and distant.”

“Little Master Bai, it’s exhausting to just stand for the whole time,” Zhang Su greeted. “Come sit down inside. Pei-Pei, lead him to a seat.”

Pei linked arms with YiHan as she joyfully replied, “Don’t worry, Zhang-ge. Leave him to me.” She then turned to YiHan and said, “Come! I’ll show you around the inside of the shop. It’s super nice. I’m telling you now, I was involved in designing the place!”

Arm in arm, the two walked away. Pei was chattering non-stop the whole time but not once did YiHan interrupt her. He merely listened with a smile.

Watching the two go, Hui commented to his husband, “Those two are quite close with each other. I didn’t expect that.”

“Pei-Pei’s a happy-go-lucky girl,” replied the other man. “She’s also very honest and frank. Rarely would anyone dislike her. Little Master Bai’s not bad himself. He’s a gentleman who knows to compromise. Most of all, he has no superficial facade at all. Perhaps it’s because the Bai family has protected him well. He’s very pure. The two are quite similar. What’s so surprising about those two getting along well?”

Hui chuckled. “You haven’t known him for long. You don’t know what they say of him before. He wasn’t like this back then. While he can’t be called bad or evil, there are two ways of describing him. If one were to be nice, they’d say he was a little wild. If one were frank, they’d call him arrogant. He always acted as if he was only beneath the gods. He didn’t care for rules and no one could rein him in. Before the older generation, he’s alright. Among his peers though, it’d be polite to merely say he was arrogant and impulsive. Hm. Perhaps he has finally matured. He’s changed quite a lot.”

“I have heard of his reputation before,” Zhang Su said with a cold smirk, “but even if we don’t consider how quickly humans adapt and change, who could say for certain all of those rumours were true? He has no power in the Bai Group but everyone in the family dotes on him. It’s not an exaggeration to say he could rule this city without being stopped. So many people who are jealous of him. However, none of them would dare let out a peep to his face. They’d do everything they can to curry his favour. How many of them would speak well of him behind his back? He was much too young back then. Mr Mu and the Bai family had also protected him well. Too well, in fact. He doesn’t get many of the tricks and twists of interacting with other people. He also isn’t one to bring himself to just do it for the sake of pleasantries. It’d be strange if his reputation was better.” He glanced at Hui and turned back to observe the two kids. “People like you, who speak badly of others because that’s what the group says, will have great reputations. Unfortunately, your true behaviours are not any better.”

Translator’s Note:

Are you trying to let the whole world know we’re having sex: This is a paraphrase of an idiom/phrase, “openly having sex during the day”. It’s considered improper to have sex during the day, let alone letting anyone else know of it.

◄Previous • Index• Next►

156. She’s Dead

Fang Yi pursed his lips as he chuckled, “You’re strange, YiHan. People are always second-guessing themselves right before the wedding. The closer it was to the wedding, the stronger the pre-wedding jitters. I’d never heard of anyone who was as impatient as you. Say, since you’re both so anxious, why didn’t you set the wedding date closer to now?”

“There’s no helping it,” YiHan sighed. “I’m afraid of the cold. I never like to leave the house in winter. I have a habit of never planning anything major in the winter. Of course, JingYuan knew of it. He said he didn’t want us to have any regrets about our wedding. Spring is warm but extremely windy. So we settled for summer.”

Fang Yi’s shoulders shook as he chuckled, “You two are so funny. By the same logic, it’s hot in the summer. It’s windy in autumn too. Then, it’s back to the freezing winter. What will you do then? Who cares about when you have the wedding? You’ll be getting registered next month. You’ll be spouses in the eyes of the law. The wedding is just a ceremony to announce it to the world.”

“That’s what JingYuan said too,” YiHan said with a smile.

Fang Yi looked up in the air for a moment, then said, “Right, I just remembered I have something to do. I have to go. Are you going to stay a while longer?”

YiHan nodded. “Oh, then go attend to it. I’ll be staying here. JingYuan said he’ll be dropping by to fetch me later. Also, please reconsider the issue with Qin Feng.”

Fang Yi hummed in reply and nodded to him in farewell before leaving the cafe.

YiHan slouched down, boredom visible in his posture. Head perched on one hand, he added a cube of sugar to his cup of coffee, then another, and another. Suddenly, a low-pitched voice rang out from beside his ear.

“You’ve ruined a perfectly fine cup of coffee,” said the voice.

That voice was so deeply familiar to YiHan that it felt like it’d been carved into his bones. And yet, he’d feel a tingle run down his spine every time he heard it.

“You’re here,” said YiHan, dodging away from where the voice came from and rubbed at the ear it had spoken into. “Do you want a cup of coffee?”

JingYuan sat down in a chair beside YiHan. He glanced at the cup of coffee, filled with a tiny mountain of cubed sugars, and let out a low chuckle.

“I’ve been here for a while,” said JingYuan. “What a shame a certain someone didn’t notice me.”

“Huh?” YiHan was surprised. “When did you arrive?”

JingYuan ran a hand through YiHan’s hair. His gaze was gentle and warm as he softly replied, “When you said you were also eager to get married.”

A red flush slowly crept up YiHan’s ears as he muttered, “It was a slip of the tongue.”

The smile on JingYuan’s face didn’t falter. “Okay. My HanHan can say whatever he likes. Oh, right. I’ve something to tell you. Tao Qi is dead.”

YiHan stared at him, stunned. “How did she die? When?”

“Today,” said JingYuan. “I’d just received a call telling me Wei Quan snuck out of his room, navigated his way around the nurses and into Tao Qi’s room. He wanted to have sex with her but she refused. The man was angry with her in the first place. He thinks he’s only locked up in a psychiatric hospital because of Tao Qi. To him, it was considered quite a big compromise for him to go to her for sex. He didn’t think she’d be so fervently against it. In Wei Quan’s eyes, that is betrayal. In a fit of rage, he strangled her to death.”

YiHan was so shocked that he needed a few moments to regain his composure. “How will Wei Quan be punished?”

“Well, he was a dangerous individual when he was admitted,” said JingYuan. “Losing control and killing Tao Qi ignited the fury in him. He ended up hurting two of the aides who tried to restrain him. He’s now sedated and sent to a special ward where he’ll likely be living the rest of his life tied to a bed.”

YiHan went silent. Then, he asked, “Did Wei Quan…succeed? I mean, with Tao Qi.”

JingYuan hugged YiHan across the shoulders as he replied, “Yes, he did. No matter how cunning Tao Qi was, her physical strength is still that of a girl’s. How can she fight against Wei Quan? My man told me Tao Qi died in an…extremely horrible manner. Her eyes were wide open, almost popping out of the sockets. Disbelief, rage, upset; those were written all over her face.”

YiHan sighed.

“HanHan,” continued JingYuan, “you’re not sympathising with her, are you? Day after day, all Tao Qi thought about was how you and TianYang should die.”

“I’m not,” YiHan replied. “I just think that it’s way too simple for someone to die. Then, once someone is dead, all grudges and hatred would come to an end. She was also just a girl, a young woman. The way she died…” He sighed.

“This is an accident. Not only is Wei Quan insane, but he’s also a trashy human being. Tao Qi herself is to blame for this too. How did she have the guts to offend someone like that? Did she really think she’s the protagonist? Did she think she can control anyone in the world if she wished to?”

YiHan nodded. “True. We must all be responsible for our own actions. The gods don’t care about your gender. What goes around, comes around. It’s karma. When I talked to her privately, I’ve told her only one of us may live. I was only bluffing. I didn’t think those words would come true.”

JingYuan tightened his embrace around YiHan. “Little one, you really dare to say anything that comes into your mind, huh? Only one of you may live? How can she be compared to you? She’s just a pretty snake, someone with an evil and toxic mind. She has no respect for the lives of others. All she thinks about is how to kill other people. She’s delusional, thinking the whole world spins around her. She didn’t die innocent. Let’s not think about it. Let’s not ruin our mood for the day. Come, it’s time to head home.”

YiHan nodded. The two then left the cafe, shoulder to shoulder.

There was something else JingYuan had yet to tell YiHan about Tao Qi. Ever since JingYuan’s visit, she has been drowning in self-doubt. Her mind slowly began to crack. Sometimes she’d suspect the whole transmigration experience was just something she made up. No such thing happened. She was always either sobbing or laughing. Her mood swung wildly in an unstable manner. Sometimes, she’d be hysterically crying and shouting. It was as if she’d experienced a mental breakdown. Frankly, death released her from the pain.

On the way back, YiHan remained silent as his mood dipped.

JingYuan repeatedly glanced back at YiHan, so much so that YiHan couldn’t help but speak up, “Why are you looking at me instead of the road?”

With a hand on the steering wheel and another freed to hold YiHan’s hand, JingYuan asked, “Are you still upset over Tao Qi? Don’t think about it. She’s not worth it. Okay?”

YiHan sighed and said, “JingYuan, where do you think the real Tao Qi has gone to?”

JingYuan blanked out. He didn’t think about that before.

YiHan wasn’t expecting an answer out of the other man anyway. He continued, “The original Tao Qi was a great girl. Smart and hardworking, she was one of the best university students in the city. She may be demure and soft on the outside but she was strong on the inside. She’s very kind and sensible. She knew how to support herself. She would never try and blame anyone or anything for a mistake she made. She was truly someone filled to the brim with the right virtues. Who’d have thought a girl like her would suddenly have her soul swapped with another? I thought that she might one day return to her own body and chase this incessantly scheming Tao Qi back to where she belonged. However, now that Tao Qi’s dead, that girl will never return.”

JingYuan gathered his thoughts before speaking, “HanHan, I know you feel like you owe the original Tao Qi something but what happened to her is none of your fault. No one could’ve known or wanted this to happen. Put it out of your mind, please?”

YiHan nodded. “Back then, I agreed to date her because I wanted to hide from you. But she was serious about it. When we broke up, I apologised to her. I came clean to her, saying I prefer men. She joked about how her mind can rest easy then as it was not a question of her charm. She was merely born the wrong sex. She’s such an open-minded person. It’s such a pity this happened.”

JingYuan chuckled. “HanHan, you’ve already done your best by her. I know you’ve been financially supporting her parents for a while now. If her soul is still around, she’d thank you.”

“You knew?” YiHan turned to look at JingYuan in surprise. “Yes, it was after I found out her soul had been replaced with another’s. I pitied her. The original Tao Qi was a dutiful daughter, yet this Tao Qi wouldn’t even give her parents a single cent. Her father couldn’t work after his accident and her mother had always been a housewife. Let’s not even talk about her younger brother. It’s good enough that he hadn’t caused any major trouble. There wasn’t a single source of income in that family. If the original Tao Qi were still around, she’d take up the burden of supporting her family. However, she’s gone. She must’ve been very anxious about her family when she left. Heh. Actually, Tao Qi’s parents are truly senseless. If I give them too much in one go, they’d give it all to the brother so he can splurge on himself. I can only give them bit by bit. I don’t even dare give them much, just enough for them to live a normal life. I have enough money. It’s just to help out poor Tao Qi.”

YiHan paused. Then, he continued, “I’m truly so superficial in my kindness. I only helped her after she’s gone. The fake Tao Qi told me that in the story, the original Tao Qi was my rival for you! Hmph!”

“HanHan, what’s with the jealousy?” JingYuan asked, stuck between crying and laughing. “This accusation fell out of thin air, okay? This Tao Qi was hysterical and delusional. Whatever she said has no chance of happening. Can’t you forget about it?”

“How can I?” YiHan asked with a mean little smile. “I’ll remember it well. Once in a while, I’ll have to go through what you’ve done.”

“Aha, so that’s the trap waiting for me,” JingYuan sighed. “I won’t ever again bring up what you’ve done in the past, okay?”

“It’s fine,” YiHan said. “You can bring it up. We can compare and­ – What was it again? Oh, yes. – hurt each other.”

“Don’t,” JingYuan laughed. “HanHan, Your Majesty, have mercy! I would never dare to go against my superiors.”

“Alright then,” YiHan said, holding back his smile. “We’ll spare you. This time.”

“Thank you, Your Majesty!” JingYuan said, playing along.

The two men had just returned to the Mu family home when YiHan’s phone rang. YiHan dug it out as JingYuan craned his neck to look at the screen. The caller was Yan Pei.

“Her again,” JingYuan pouted. “What does she want this time?”

YiHan chuckled at JingYuan’s words as he answered the call, “Pei-Pei, what is it?”

“YiHan, do you remember about Zhang-ge’s bookshop being renovated? Its expansion?” Yan Pei cheerfully asked. “The renovations are all done now. They’re reopening tomorrow. Are you coming?”

“Is it tomorrow?” YiHan said, lightly smacking himself in the head. “Why did I think it’s the day after tomorrow?”

“Hahaha,” Pei laughed. “I knew your memory’s not that good. You’re getting married now so your memory’s even worse. Well? Aren’t I a good friend? I even called and reminded you.”

“Thank you so much, Queen Pei-Pei,” YiHan chuckled. “I did remember the wrong date. If not for you, I would’ve missed out on the reopening.”

“No need to thank me,” came the proud reply. “See you tomorrow then.”

Translator’s Note:

Tao Qi is to blame for this too: Reminder here that victim-blaming should never be done, especially when it’s a systemic issue. It might seem okay here because we only think of Tao Qi as an “evil character” but no one deserves to be raped or murdered.

◄Previous • Index• Next►

155. Wedding Date

JingYuan gazed deep into YiHan’s eyes. He leaned down and kissed him on the forehead. Then, with the most serious tone he had ever used in his whole life, he said, “I do.”

YiHan smiled as he leaned in to land a gentle peck on JingYuan’s fingers. “Ceremony complete,” he said. “From today onwards, you are mine, for real. You can’t run even if you want to.”

JingYuan maintained eye contact as he said, “My home is wherever you are. Where can I go? Get up. Doesn’t your back hurt?”

The smile on YiHan’s face widened into a beaming, blinding grin, revealing his two dimples. Then, he stood up, a hand supporting his back which felt like it was being snapped in half. He trembled as he shuffled back into bed. He wrapped his arms around JingYuan’s waist once more as he buried his face in the other man’s abdomen.

“JingYuan, did you know?” YiHan let out a muffled chuckle. “I was so nervous just now. Aah, now that I think of it, isn’t our proposal way too simple? We have no flowers, no rings. I’m even in my sleepwear while you’re on an IV drip! How are we going to leave behind a perfect memory? This should be considered a dark moment in our past.”

JingYuan said nothing. All he did was pull YiHan up higher by the arms until the younger man was sprawled all over JingYuan’s chest. Confused, YiHan tentatively shifted to put his ear right against JingYuan’s chest. Oh, this man. His heart was thumping hard. It was thumping to the same rhythm his was beating out. YiHan laughed as he leaned up to place his chest against JingYuan’s. The two hearts thumped and raced and slowed until, gradually, they began to beat in unison.

Perhaps joyful events had health benefits, mentally and physically. Soon after that day, JingYuan’s body recovered. Just a few more days of medication and JingYuan’s fever was all gone. He was also back at full energy levels. Having gone through a few days of IV drip, JingYuan merely looked like a thinner version of his usual self now. There was not a sign of sickness on him at all. YiHan was in a good mood too. He’d frequently cook vegetable congee for JingYuan. Because of the frequent practice, he’d gotten much better at cooking. The congee also looked much more appetising than it did when YiHan first tried his hand at cooking.

The wedding was now formally in progress. YiHan’s parents were in fervent support of the wedding and JingYuan thought the faster the wedding was held, the better. Still, winter in the city was freezing. YiHan had a habit of never holding any major events in the winter. JingYuan understood that habit though so, after a family meeting with the rest of the Bai family, they finally decided on having the wedding in summer next year. They’d host an engagement party first. It would be held in a month and act as their public announcement.

The President of Mu Group and the youngest son of the Bai family will be joining hands in marriage. The news of their marriages exploded among the citizens of the city. Many people sighed and gossiped. The youngest son of the Bai family might hold no power in the Bai Group but he owned a lot of the Bai Group stocks. The two involved were both men. There was no such thing as a bridal price or dowry. The Bai and Mu families were close in the first place. Now, they’re joined in marriage. It’d be too polite and estranging to say they’re entering an equal partnership. It was more apt to say they’ve merged. Based on how lovestruck Mu JingYuan acted when it came to the Little Master of the Bai family, he had likely long since thought of the Bai family as his own. He was even more engrossed with the affairs of the Bai family than the family members were. Wait, no. They were getting married. He would truly be a Bai family member then. While the Bai and Mu families are considered separate families, they can be treated as a single entity. That meant, from now on, they’d be the largest and most powerful family of the city.

Frankly, not many people in the know were surprised by the news. Everyone knew the two families were close. This was just another addition to their bond. It didn’t change much. Anyone who’s anyone in the city would know the Little Master Bai was the apple of Mu JingYuan’s eye. Even when held in his palms, he’d be afraid of scaring the younger man. If Bai YiHan was a candy, Mu JingYuan would be afraid of melting the other man by merely closing his mouth around him. If someone dared to lay a single finger on the Little Master Bai? The first to go berserk might not be Bai YiHan’s parents but Mu JingYuan. The two might have known each other since they were children but nothing tied them together. At most, one might call them childhood besties. Mu JingYuan’s protective tendencies were really just him marking his territory. Many people in the city understood that but with the two men’s social ranks, no one dared to speak of it unless the two publicised it. It was no surprise that the two men would be announcing their engagement.

Meanwhile, with the Chen family, Madam Chen had already started inviting Ma Bai out on social outings like shopping or going to a spa together. They act so much like sisters who’d grown up together. Madam Chen would keep directing the conversation to XueQing’s relationship with TianYang. She wanted to know just what the Bai family thought of marriage. With an idiotic, lovestruck fool for a son, this mother had gone all out. XueQing intended to wait for a while longer. Their father had just retired while it had only been a short while since Bai Yan had formally taken over the reins of the company. She hoped to stay in the Bai Group for a while longer and help her brother achieve full control over the Bai Group.

The Chen family’s response was of understanding. TianYang was a brain-dead fan of XueQing. While he dreamed of getting married as soon as possible, he had stated his unconditional support of XueQing’s decision.

As for Yan, the man would often be found staying the night at Jiang Hua’s place. The Bai family were all overjoyed at him finally being in a relationship. The only thing Yan’s family had yet to do was celebrate publicly with fireworks. In regards to his stayovers at Hua’s home, they were all in full support. If the man ever slept in his own home for more than a day or two, someone in his family would start worrying. They’d ask him if Hua had finally gotten rid of his bad taste in men, if Hua had dumped Yan. The man was rendered speechless each time. Every day, it felt like his family was eagerly hoping to “marry him off” to Hua right away. They’d always push him to sleep at the other man’s home. Then, every few days, the Bai family would invite Hua over for dinner. Each time that Hua stepped into the Bai family home, Yan would find himself wondering if he was the one who’d been picked up from the trash while Hua was the true son they’d found after losing him in an incident. Yan would be sitting beside Hua but his family would just shower Hua with love while not even bothering to glance at Yan. It made the feeling of being ignored worse.

***

During one afternoon, YiHan was sitting in a cafe with Fang Yi. While stirring the coffee in his cup, YiHan asked the man, “So you two are still at a stalemate? It’s been so long. Why drag it out? It’s not good for anyone.”

The policeman pursed his lips and replied, “I don’t want this to happen either but he just wouldn’t leave. I’ve tried chasing him out several times but he’d insist on lounging around in my home. What can I do?”

YiHan let go of his teaspoon and sighed, “Ah-Yi, it’s just an identity. Is there a need to be so angry? He truly treats you well. You should be able to see that.”

The other man frowned. “YiHan, you know who he is. He’s…the head of the Hidden Dragon! I’m just a mere cop. Let’s put aside belonging to different sides of society for now. Even if we can work on the same side of the law, we have nothing in common. We can’t be friends!”

“Why do you have nothing in common? Weren’t you two good friends before you found out who he is?” YiHan asked.

The man’s frown deepened. “As you’ve said, I didn’t know back then. But now that I know it, it’s already a kindness that I didn’t arrest him on the spot.”

YiHan shrugged. “See? It’s because he knew this is how you’d react that he didn’t dare come clean.”

The policeman rubbed at his forehead. “I’m a cop, YiHan. While I’m nobody, being a cop has always been a childhood dream of mine. I can’t give up on it.”

“No one’s asking you to give up on your job,” YiHan said. “He didn’t say that, right?”

“He didn’t say it but think about it. How can a policeman be friends with a triad boss? I really don’t get it. Why would the head of the Hidden Dragon throw away his dignity and persist on staying in my home? Why can I chase him out?”

YiHan sighed. “Ah-Yi, you are a straightforward, passionate, bold and observant man. There’s nothing wrong with you but you’re just too uptight, too concerned about the details. Does it matter who he is? I think what’s more important is his personality. Yes, to the Hidden Dragon gang, he’s the head, Qin Feng. But when he’s in your home, he’s Qin An, just a bored street thug who jokes around all day long. Ah-Yi, you need to understand. This world is not split into black and white. There’s a reason the Hidden Dragon exists. I think the true trump card our society has is the Hidden Dragon gang that’s being helmed by Qin Feng. We should thank him. In this world, it can’t just be the police who can right injustices. Qin Feng’s not a bad man. You should give him a chance to explain himself. Also, there’s no way that I’d believe you don’t miss your past friendship with him at all.”

Fang Yi scrubbed at his face and leaned back against his chair. No words were spoken.

YiHan glanced at him before continuing, “When I first met him, when I first knew who he truly was, I was actually afraid for you. I worried. After all, Qin Feng is no kind gentleman. Standing next to him, you looked like the little white rabbit engulfed in the fierce beast’s embrace. Hey, don’t get angry. It’s just a simile. But that’s what I truly thought. However, JingYuan told me Qin Feng held no ill will to you.

“That man knows right from wrong. He’s also grateful and knows to pay back his debts. His ‘evil’ nature is evident on his face. He’s not like those false gentlemen in high society. He won’t look good-natured while hiding his evil within. Then, through you, I got to know him a little better. JingYuan and I have been keeping an eye on him this whole time. Our conclusion is he’s very safe when it comes to you. While he used a fake identity, his heart and personality were true. In that case, what’s there to fight about?”

Fang Yi bit his lip and said, “I know you won’t harm me. I also know he has absolutely no bad intentions when it comes to me but I just can’t get over it. Oh, right. I haven’t congratulated you. Your relationship with Mr Mu has finally borne fruit.”

“Thank you,” YiHan couldn’t help but smile as he said that. “I didn’t think we’d get married so soon but he’s in a rush. I’d be spending the rest of my life with him regardless of marriage, so it didn’t matter to me when we do it.”

“The wedding date is next year?” Fang Yi asked with a smile of his own.

YiHan nodded.

“When do you plan on getting registered?” asked the man.

“JingYuan’s thinking of next month. We’ll get it done after the engagement party,” replied YiHan.

Fang Yi let out a laugh as he said, “Mr Mu sure is in a hurry. I think he can’t wait a single minute longer. He must wish you two could get registered right now.”

YiHan paused in contemplation before replying, “I’m actually quite eager for it too. Ah-Yi, before, I thought a marriage certificate is just a piece of paper. It has no use. The law’s powers in regards to marriage are limited. So many people who have gotten married and divorced. Now, I’m longing to witness that piece of paper be filled with both of our names. I feel like I’ve been possessed or something. I didn’t feel it when we first set the wedding date, but now that it’s confirmed, time feels so slow. A day feels like a year. How I wish the wedding would be tomorrow and avoid any hesitation altogether.”

Translator’s Note

Ah-Yi: Ah = prefix added to make a name into an affectionate/friendly nickname. It has been left in for Fang Yi as some readers have commented that merely using “Yi” can get confusing, especially with YiHan’s name thrown into the paragraph.

◄Previous • Index• Next►

154. Will You?

Looking down at YiHan, JingYuan’s breathing started coming out in harsh pants once more. He resisted the urge to continue further and retreated. Then, he moved from the back of YiHan’s neck to YiHan’s lips.

“Meanie!” JingYuan spat out after a few pecks to YiHan’s lips.

When Dr Chen arrived, it was noon. To his surprise, YiHan was still asleep.

Deep within JingYuan, he was upset at how Dr Chen kept shooting glances at YiHan while conducting a medical check-up on JingYuan.

“He’s exhausted from having to take care of me for the past month,” JingYuan muttered. “Be quiet. Don’t wake him up.”

Dr Chen nodded in agreement and said, “Indeed. The Little Master has been cherished and pampered from his birth. He had never been through tough times before. He must be tired. Fatigue isn’t the real issue. More important is his worry for your body, Mr Mu. Madam Bai has told me his appetite has been quite lacking lately. She had me secretly proved a few supplements for him. I don’t know if he took them or not, though.”

When JingYuan heard Dr Chen described YiHan as “cherished and pampered from birth” and “had never been through tough times”, it reminded him of the “disaster” hiding beneath the blanket. The dissatisfaction in his heart grew even more. He was so focused on beating himself up that he didn’t even know when the needle was inserted into his veins.

YiHan finally woke up by the time JingYuan was done with his second bag of saline drip. YiHan tossed and turned to rest on his other side before opening his eyes. At first, all he could see was the muscular chest of a man, covered by the thin fabric of sleepwear. Still dazed and drowsy from sleep, YiHan lifted a hand to rest against it. It took him a few blinks before his eyes decided to wander upward and straight into the loving eyes of JingYuan. As if he’d been possessed, YiHan clambered straight up without hesitation and kissed those thin lips.

“Morning,” YiHan said, his voice hoarse from last night’s activities.

All blood in JingYuan’s body had fled to his groin at YiHan’s seductive actions. He wanted so badly to pounce and take him then and there.

“It’s not morning anymore,” JingYuan replied in an equally hoarse voice. “It’s the afternoon.”

“Oh,” YiHan blankly replied. Then, he slowly leaned down to rest against JingYuan’s shoulder.

Five seconds passed.

“What?” YiHan yelped, suddenly surging upright. “It’s already the afternoon?” He leapt up and out of the bed. However, because of the sudden brash movement, it tugged at his strained waist and injured spot. With another loud yelp, he fell back in bed. His face went stark white with pain.

Shocked, JingYuan hurriedly reached out to pull YiHan back up. He paid no attention to the needle and tube still connected to his hand. YiHan’s sharp eyes caught the glint of the needle.

“Don’t move!” YiHan shouted in the loudest voice he could muster.

JingYuan instantly froze. By the time the man came back to his senses, YiHan had already climbed back up in a sitting position. The moment the younger man was upright, he pushed JingYuan back against the headboard. He then leaned forward to check on JingYuan’s hands. Thankfully, JingYuan’s actions hadn’t disturbed the needle too much. There was nothing wrong with the drip either.

YiHan let out a sigh of relief and grumbled, “Are you a fool? You’re still on a drip! How could you just move without care?”

JingYuan wrapped his other hand around YiHan and mumbled, “Does it hurt a lot? It’s my fault. I went overboard last night.”

YiHan’s face immediately went red and he stuttered, “I was a consenting participant. How is it your fault? What’s bad about it?”

“Your behind and knees are all hurt. Did you know that?” JingYuan rumbled, hand raised to stroke YiHan’s cheek. “Why didn’t you say you were in pain?”

“Huh? Oh, it’s fine. It’ll heal up in two days.”

“My question is why didn’t you tell me you were in pain.”

“We were both enjoying ourselves.” YiHan ruffled in hair. “If I tell you, the mood would be ruined. Anyway, it didn’t feel painful at all.”

JingYuan grabbed YiHan by the arm. “When I was cleaning up after, you were still bleeding. And your knees are all bruised. How can you say it didn’t hurt at all?”

YiHan carefully tilted himself to sit while leaning on his side instead of letting his butts bear his weight. “JingYuan,” he sighed in exasperation, “can we not talk about this during the day in such a serious tone? It’s so embarrassing. Right. When did Dr Chen come in? Why didn’t you wake me up? What will happen to my dignity now that he’s seen me sleeping in the middle of the day?”

JingYuan stared at YiHan for a moment before stroking YiHan on the head and going along with the topic change. “He came during noon. I told him you hadn’t been sleeping well lately. It’s exhaustion.”

YiHan nodded in reply. Then, he began to shuffle his way off the bed.

JingYuan reached out and pulled YiHan back. “You’re still wounded. Where do you want to go?”

Tugging at the hand around his arm, YiHan replied, “How is this a wound? I’m going to get you some food.”

JingYuan didn’t let go. Instead, he pulled YiHan further into his embrace. “We can just ask Ms Liu to bring us some food. You don’t need to go. Just lie here with me.”

Afraid that struggling any more would result in JingYuan attempting to use the hand with the needle, YiHan obediently shuffled back into JingYuan’s embrace. “It’s past noon. I’m not sick. It’s shameful for me to still be lying in bed. I won’t.”

JingYuan patted the spot on the bed next to him and said, “Sprawl out over here. I’ll give you a massage. Does your waist not hurt?”

It truly was still in pain. YiHan hesitated but still went along with the suggestion.

JingYuan’s hand rubbed and kneaded at the back of YiHan’s waist. The force he used was just right.

“HanHan, you–”

“JingYuan, are you angry with me?” YiHan interrupted, voice muffled from being face down on the bed.

“I am,” JingYuan honestly replied. “Do you trust me now?”

“I do,” YiHan glumly replied.

“Then I’ll do my best and forgive you,” JingYuan chuckled.

Still, YiHan felt the need to explain himself. “I’m just…afraid. Afraid you’ll be made to do something you don’t like, to be with someone you don’t want to be with. Our relationship should be based on our true desires within our hearts, not on other external factors. I want you to be able to do whatever you please, to be with whoever you want to be with. I don’t want you to be forced into anything at all. Mn. I just want you to be happy and free to live life as you wish.”

JingYuan stopped smiling and solemnly replied, “My greatest wish it to be with you. There are no external factors. I’m happy as long as we’re happy together.”

YiHan laughed and replied, “Okay, I got it. Actually, I feel like it’s such a pity for you to be with me.”

“How is it a pity?” JingYuan was not happy with what he heard. “Do you think we’re not fit for each other?”

“Look,” YiHan said, “you’re the head of the Mu family, the great CEO of the Mu Group. I am a second-generation rich kid who has no skills or knowledge. You’re smart. Nothing can defeat you. I’m stupid. I also have bad tastes. Wait, no. It’s not all bad. At least, I have good tastes in falling in love with you. But I might’ve used up all of my potential in falling in love with you. Everyone else I’ve befriended is either a backstabber ora schemer. Anyway, you’re like the dragon among mere mortals while I’m just society’s trash. We’re polar opposites. How are we fit for each other?”

JingYuan couldn’t help but give YiHan’s back a light pat as he angrily rebuked, “What are you babbling about? Society’s trash? Who told you that?”

YiHan let out a hiss. “No one. I just thought of that myself.”

JingYuan had immediately regretted patting YiHan on the back the moment his palm landed. He hurriedly rubbed and soothed at the spot when YiHan yelped in pain.

“HanHan, I don’t care where you heard such dastardly descriptions from but I won’t allow you to put yourself down,” said JingYuan. His voice was much gentler now. “You are the third son of the Bai family, the entire family’s precious baby and the lover of Mu JingYuan, me. In my heart, no one is better than you. I am older than you by a few years. I watched you grow up. While you can be a little lost sometimes, you are pure and cute. Your purity didn’t disappear with age. It has always been with you. Even to this day, you are genuine, kind and grateful. You show your true self to me, to your family. Hidden within your soul is the best of humanity. Otherwise, why do you think the old Mr Yan, the man who has seen through countless people and has numerous people begging to win his favour, why would he like you out of everyone at the party? Yes, you have many flaws. You can be selfish at times and you love to split hairs over nothing, but your strengths are like the sun. They shine so brightly that your flaws are never given a chance to shine. To be honest, even if you truly are useless, I like you. There is no logic to my love.”

The more JingYuan talked, the closer YiHan’s face got to steaming and boiling over. “You make it sound like I’m an angel,” YiHan muttered. “You’re just boasting. You are the lover who is blind to all or the old grandma selling her wares, just the boasts of a biased seller…”

JingYuan gave a low chuckle. “At least you still remember I’m your “lover”. No more trying to push me out?”

YiHan looked up into his eyes. “Look at you. You just said you were going to forgive me and now you’re going through our past again. I’ll be frank with you. Don’t take whatever I’ve said at face value. It’s always easier to talk about doing something than actually doing it. If you truly didn’t love me and would get married to someone else in the future, I might not live for more than a few years.”

“Don’t say that!” JingYuan barked.

“It’s true. The frustration would just broil and build inside me to the point of death. Anyway, I can’t even sleep without you. Before we got together, I could still handle it. But then we slept together and we parted. It was like someone who’d just had a taste of the pleasures sex can give but was forced to cut it all off straight away. The itch was just too much.”

A dark cloud loomed over JingYuan’s face. He gave YiHan’s head a harsh stroke and rub and said, “I told you to not go on about such nonsense! Why are you still going on? Also, what kind of comparison is that?”

YiHan turned to lean on his side and looked at JingYuan. “What comparison?” he asked with an evil smirk. “It’s normal. We’ve all been through it before. You know.”

JingYuan gave YiHan the side-eye. “And you still wouldn’t let me touch you for a whole month. If not for that, I wouldn’t go so crazy last night…” JingYuan interrupted himself with a smack to his own head and said, aggravation in his voice, “I’d gone insane last night. I actually hurt you.”

YiHan shuffled forward and hugged JingYuan around the waist. “When did I not let you touch me? I was afraid you were actually an unwilling participant in our relationship.” When JingYuan’s face became even more upset, YiHan hurriedly continued, “Okay, okay. I know. It’s all my fault. I should’ve been more confident. I’m quite the charmer, don’t you think? I have you wrapped around my pinkie. Tee-hee. My life is complete even if I achieve nothing but this.”

JingYuan didn’t know whether to cry or laugh at that. He went along with YiHan’s hug and fully embraced the man. His hand gently patted YiHan on the back as he contemplated his next words.

“Well,” JingYuan finally uttered, “when are we getting married?”

YiHan was silent. Then, the man climbed out of the bed. JingYuan’s heart jolted in fear.

To JingYuan’s surprise, YiHan limped back to the bed with a hand supporting his back. He knelt down on one knee and placed his hands on the fingertips of JingYuan’s hand, the hand that had a needle sticking out of it.

“JingYuan,” YiHan solemnly said, looking up at the other man, “will you marry me? Will you be my lawfully-wedded spouse? No matter how stupid or useless I am, you won’t abandon me. To be by my side until the very last breaths of our lives?”

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153. Why Are You So Contradictory?

Behind JingYuan, YiHan fervently waved his hands in a “no” gesture at Ms Liu. However, Ms Liu had always been the kind to speak her mind without hesitation. By the time she noticed YiHan’s actions, she had already finished prattling about how YiHan had made congee for JingYuan.

“Shoot, I forgot,” Ms Liu dazedly said. “Little Master said that I can’t tell you.”

At Ms Liu’s words, YiHan helplessly hung his head low.

JingYuan turned around. His dark eyes burned into YiHan’s scalp as the other man adamantly looked at the floor instead of at JingYuan.

“Hurry up and go eat!” YiHan said, still hanging his head as he pushed JingYuan along to the table. “It’ll get cold.”

JingYuan obediently walked over to the dining table. As he sat down, Ms Liu scurried away back into the kitchen.

“Well, erm,” YiHan softly said, “try it. I’ve had a taste test. This congee might not look the best but it tastes fine.”

JingYuan scooped some congee up with the spoon Ms Liu had placed beside the bowl and took a bite of it.

“Well?” YiHan couldn’t stop himself from eagerly asking. “Does it tastes too salty? I hear sick people would always find food a little saltier than usual so I only put a tiny bit of salt.”

To JingYuan, it wasn’t too salty. In fact, he couldn’t taste any salt at all. “It’s really good. Hm,” JingYuan said. “It looks good, very appetising.” (Note: the congee is colourful. It looks something like the concoction witches in cartoons are always stirring in their pot.)

YiHan pursed his lips. He tried to resist from smiling but he still failed, letting a little loose into his face. “Mn,” YiHan said, trying to hold onto his composure, “it’s the first time I’ve tried cooking congee. I didn’t do all that well. I’ll try and cook more for you. I’ll get better with practice.”

JingYuan was so touched that he was nearly brought to tears. “You don’t need to cook for me all the time. Cooking is hard work and it’s dangerous.”

“It’s not hard work,” YiHan gently replied, looking into JingYuan’s eyes. “I had never experienced the joy of cooking before. When I was cooking today, the thought of making food for you made me so happy.”

JingYuan’s body truly felt as light as feather now. His joy made him feel as if he could fly. Before he lost all control to the happiness, JingYuan cleared his throat and dipped his head down to focus on the congee before him. Both of his ears were flushed red.

Ms Liu walked out of the kitchen with a tray filled with a bowl of rice and a few side dishes that were blander and less oily than usual. “You’re sick, sir. These dishes are better for you and gentler on your stomach. Once you’re better, I’ll cook up a delicious feast.”

Ms Liu placed the dishes on the table and swiftly returned to the kitchen.

“She ran so fast,” YiHan burst out chuckling.

JingYuan glanced up at YiHan, looked down and glanced at YiHan again. There was a warm smile on his face.

After dinner, the couple returned to their rooms. JingYuan went straight into the bathroom. The man had broken out in a sweat during his afternoon nap. He felt so sticky and uncomfortable that he had to wash the sweat off. Sitting in the bathtub, JingYuan closed his eyes and thought about YiHan’s attitude throughout the day. When he heard a noise at the door, he opened his eyes and turned. It was YiHan in a long dressing gown. His hair was still dripping wet as he walked further into the bathroom.

“I came,” YiHan bit his lip and said upon seeing JingYuan looking at him, “to help you with your shower.”

“It’s fine,” JingYuan warmly responded. “I can do it myself. You’re exhausted. Go to bed first.”

YiHan pursed his lips and said, “Your fever just broke. Your strength must not be back yet. Showering uses up quite a lot of stamina.”

JingYuan kept quiet and looked back at YiHan. After staring into each other’s eyes for a long while, YiHan felt like JingYuan had seen through every nook and cranny in his soul. YiHan bit down hard at his lips and twisted his head to a side.

“Hurry up then,” YiHan whispered. “I’ll be waiting outside.”

YiHan had just taken a step when he heard JingYuan call out to him, “YiHan.”

YiHan stopped but he didn’t look back.

JingYuan sighed and said, “I am rather tired. It’d be nice if you help me.”

YiHan’s fingers twisted and played with the belt of his sleeping robe. Then, he turned and walked to the bathtub. He knelt down and solemnly helped JingYuan wash up.

The man in the bathtub silently stared at YiHan. Those dark eyes boring into YiHan made him a little uneasy.

“What are you looking at me for?” YiHan glumly blurted.

JingYuan didn’t speak for a moment before replying, “Your sleeves are wet.”

YiHan hummed in response and said, “It’s fine. I’ll get changed later.”

“Wet clothes don’t feel nice against the skin,” JingYuan solemnly said. “The bathroom’s not cold. Why not take it off?”

YiHan’s hands froze. He pulled them out of the water and slowly pulled his robe open. The dressing gown slid open, revealing a fair body covered only by a tiny piece of underwear.

JingYuan took in a deeper inhale as his fingers clutched hard at the edges of the bathtub. He said nothing.

YiHan placed his dressing gown to the side and reached down into the water again. His hands felt much warmer now to JingYuan.

YiHan continued washing JingYuan for a few minutes before stopping and mumbling, “You…”

JingYuan glanced down and what he saw peeking at him from beneath the water made him slap his forehead.

“HanHan,” said JingYuan, “I want to kiss you.”

YiHan froze up. He felt a little jolt of electricity run through his body at those words. He pursed his lips again and shuffled forward.

“Then, kiss me,” YiHan whispered. “Why ask?”

JingYuan gave YiHan a deep look before his chest surged forward. His arms stretched out and pulled YiHan into his embrace by the neck. Then, he dipped his head to kiss the other man.

The instant their lips met, the two men let out a sigh of satisfaction. It was a passionate kiss and JingYuan’s actions could be considered biting instead. YiHan opened his lips and welcomed JingYuan’s tongue. Little moans and whimper escaped from his throat. It seemed like JingYuan had sucked in all the air from his lungs. His vision swam and wavered. Before his vision went black, JingYuan pulled him into the bathtub. With water loudly splashing out of the tub, YiHan was in the tub with JingYuan while the only piece of fabric on YiHan’s body was soaked through. It clung tightly on YiHan’s body while turning semi-transparent. However, it was an eyesore to JingYuan. Soon, it was cruelly stripped off and thrown to the wet bathroom tiles.

JingYuan thrust and turned and plunged for so long that YiHan couldn’t even moan or whimper. When they moved back to the bedroom, YiHan was as limp as a doll. JingYuan shoved a ball of blanket under YiHan’s hips. By the time YiHan nodded off to sleep, he’d lost count of how many times they’d been at it and he was still swaying and bumping against the bundle of fabric.

On the next morning, the sun shone brightly down on the bed. YiHan was still fast asleep while JingYuan, who’d “worked” for the whole night, was much more energetic than the day before. The man was sitting on the bed, clothed and frowning in frustration.

YiHan was in the same position as he was in last night after JingYuan cleaned him up. He didn’t move an inch at all. His breathing was deep and even while dark skin enveloped his eyes. He showed no signs of waking up at all.

The blanket ended just over YiHan’s shoulder, revealing a neck full of blue-green hickeys. JingYuan knew all too well what was hidden beneath the blanket. There wouldn’t be a single inch of skin that was free of love bites. The thighs were the most severely bruised. They weren’t dotted with bruises. Patches upon patches wrapped around YiHan’s leg. No one could tell YiHan’s skin was supposed to be fair and pale underneath all the bruises. His lips were red and swollen. His dark circles were dark and deep. YiHan had also gotten much thinner over the past few weeks. Curled into a tiny ball under the blanket, YiHan looked as miserable as pitiful as anyone can be.

JingYuan ruffled his hair in anger. How he wished he could punch himself in the face. When he did it with YiHan before, he’d always been extremely careful to control his strength. Occasionally, he’d lose control but he had never hurt YiHan. He knew there was some anger in his actions last night. Combined with how long it had been since he’d achieved release, JingYuan had lost control.

Once more, JingYuan pulled the blanket away from YiHan’s form. In a touch so soft that it would even disturb a hair on YiHan, he ran his hand over the knees covered in medication cream. Then, he let out another deep sigh.

During the latter parts of the night, YiHan had gotten hurt. It must’ve hurt then, right? But YiHan said nothing. He just let JingYuan continue without any signs of pain. This had been how YiHan acted during their entire relationship, except for the month or so they’d spent in a cold war. YiHan was always like this. No matter how the man acted during the day, he’d just go along with whatever JingYuan wanted in bed. He would never say no.

JingYuan didn’t get it at all. Why was YiHan like this? Logically speaking, someone who’d grown up with a temper would be more self-centred in bed. He should wish for other people to go along with his wants instead. Why was it absolute obedience instead when it came to JingYuan?

JingYuan leaned down and wrapped YiHan, and the blanket covering him, in an embrace. He sighed again. There was actually nothing to ponder about here. There was only one explanation for YiHan’s actions. It’s because YiHan loved him. Since YiHan was so deeply in love with him, why wouldn’t the man trust him? Why would the man not try even fighting back when he heard what he did back at the study? Why did YiHan so easily decide to let go?

JingYuan kissed the back of YiHan’s neck and whispered, “HanHan, why are you so contradictory?”

Translator’s Notes:

Limp as a doll: The text originally had it as “Myasthenia gravis” (MG), a neuromuscular/autoimmune disease that leads to muscle weakness which usually affects the nerves and/or muscles around the head, neck and chest. However, the Chinese name literally translates to “strengthless muscle disease” so the author might not really mean MG specifically.

Blackout during sex: Please remember that this would usually be considered rape unless discussed about beforehand. Consent only matters if the participant is awake and it can be taken away at any moment.

To those who are celebrating, have a happy Lunar New Year! There will still be updates next week.

◄Previous • Index• Next►

152. I’ve Decided

YiHan sat down on the bed. A finger reached out to hover over JingYuan’s dark circles and slowly slid around them, still separated by air.

“If you’d really let me go, I would’ve been devastated to the point of death. You…” YiHan softly murmured. “I’ll trust you one more time. If you dare lie to me again, I’ll truly hate you.”

YiHan paused. After a brief second of hesitation, he continued, “If you get better fast, I’ll…I’ll go along with whatever you want. If you’re angry I didn’t trust you, I’ll let you vent your anger out on me. I promise I won’t fight back or talk back. Okay?” As he said so, his fingers slowly curled around JingYuan’s fingertips. The warmth of the other man made him feel like the gaping hole in his heart had been filled up once more. His heart finally didn’t feel like it was gushing out blood the entire time while letting in bursts of cold air.

YiHan softly sighed. At this very moment, his body felt as light as a feather. It was as if a heavy, giant boulder had been lifted off his back. YiHan leaned down and kissed JingYuan’s fingers before slouching down to rest his upper body on the edge of the bed.

Then, in a voice so soft that it nearly blended into the ambient noise of the room, YiHan whispered, “Since you say there can be no doubt about your love for me, you’re still mine. I gave you a chance. I tried to set you free. You refused it. It’s not my fault now. I’ll be bothering you for the rest of our lives. There won’t be any more chances for you to run.

“JingYuan, I’ve decided to hold on tight to you. The past few weeks had been torture and I hadn’t even left your side then. If I truly left you, the pain would be worse than death. Even if you truly are lying to me, I won’t let you go. I don’t care if it’s selfish. I don’t want to leave you anyway. I want to risk it. Even if I’m torn to pieces and shattered to the core, I’ll definitely cling onto you until that very moment.

YiHan then softly snickered to himself as his fingers scraped against JingYuan’s blanket. “But don’t worry. I’m much better now. I’m dumb. I’m easily fooled and used as a tool against my loved ones. I won’t be doing anything big or productive, but I can at least be a good child. I’ll tell you everything from now on. You’re smart. I’ll listen to everything you say. Then, I won’t make a mistake. Look, aren’t I doing well after I came back? I haven’t caused an incident yet.”

YiHan sighed. “JingYuan, I must’ve saved the world in a previous life. Why else would you fall in love with me? I’m so lucky.”

YiHan laid there for a while, covering JingYuan’s cold hands with his. Suddenly, he whispered, “I can’t tell you everything though. There’s at least one matter I can’t tell you. Actually, sometimes I wonder. You love me. So you might not find me disgusting even if you know about my past, right? But I still can’t say it. I wanted you to keep thinking of me as clean and pure. This will be the only thing I’ll be keeping a secret from you. I’ll take this to my grave. No one will ever know, especially you.”

YiHan was about to drift off to sleep when he heard someone lightly knocking on the door. Afraid that it might wake JingYuan up after the man had finally fallen asleep, YiHan hurriedly rose to his feet and opened the door. It was Chen Hong. The man had a pile of documents in his hands. He was about to speak when YiHan rose a finger to his lips in a shushing motion. Chen Hong quickly understood and closed his open mouth. The man took a step back.

YiHan looked back at the bed. JingYuan was still asleep and showed no signs of being disturbed. Letting out a sigh of relief, YiHan then stepped out of the room and closed the door behind him.

As the two men walked down to the living room, YiHan shot a glance at the stack of papers in Chen Hong’s arms and asked, “Here to deliver some documents to JingYuan?”

Chen Hong nodded. “Yes. Is Mr Mu asleep?”

“Yes,” YiHan replied. “He’d just fallen asleep. Finally, a proper, restful sleep. Leave the documents on the table. I’ll hand them to him once he wakes up.”

“Okay,” Chen Hong said, placing his armful of papers on the coffee table of the living room as the two sat down. After a quick scan of YiHan’s face, Chen Hong smiled and asked, “Has the ice between you two finally been broken? Mr Mu will soon get better then.”

“How did you know we were fighting?” YiHan asked with a raised eyebrow.

“I’ve worked under Mr Mu for years,” Chen Hong replied with a chuckle. “While I can’t say I understand every single move and expression he makes, I understand half of them at least. He’s someone who doesn’t wear his feelings on his sleeve. The only thing that can move him to this extreme is anything related to you, Little Master Bai. He had been feeling down before. I’m guessing it must’ve been because of issues in his relationship with you.”

“Oh? You seem quite knowledgeable on what goes on between us,” said YiHan.

Chen Hong quickly raised a hand to wave before him in a “no” gesture as he said, “No, no. Mr Mu rarely lets anyone know of what’s going on in his private life with you. However, he has loved you for years. Hence, I can make a few educated guesses based on his emotions and actions.”

The fist clenched tight on YiHan’s knee gradually loosened as YiHan calmly asked, “Loved me for years? You’re exaggerating, right?”

Chen Hong chuckled again. “Not at all. It’s been many years. As long as it concerns you, he will prioritise it, no matter how trivial the issue. As long as it’s a call from you, he needs to instantly take the call. No matter the time of day, even during meetings. He might even hang up on the other party just to answer your call. Then, even though it might just be a call you made out of boredom, he will wait for you to end the call first before going back to work. When this habit first started, there were many people in the company who were upset. They thought he was too lax in his work. They said you’ve severely affected Mr Mu’s work ethics. Some people tried criticising him about this habit. However, Mr Mu came straight out to all of the executives in the company and said, ‘He is the most important being in my life. If any of you have opinions about it, you’d best swallow those words back and keep them locked up. If I hear a single negative word about him, I don’t care who it is, but that person had best be ready to pack their things up on the spot.’

 “That happened, hm, about three or four years ago. Everyone who’d worked in the company for that long knows of it. People say he’s just a bro-con, a slave to his little brother, but those who worked closer to him all knew that he’s not a slave of any family members. He’s just a man in love. Because it wasn’t a love voiced out loud before, no one dared to mention a word of it.

“There was a time when you and Mr Mu would come into the office together. As long as you’re there, the only apt description for Mr Mu would be lovestruck. But if there was a day when you weren’t around? Heh. Pardon my disrespect but he’s like a frost-covered – ahem – as if he was covered in frost. He’d exude a strong aura of helplessness. Everyone in the office now knows that if Little Master Bai is in, it doesn’t matter if they made a tiny little mistake. That’s because Mr Mu would be in a good mood and Mr Mu in a good mood would be much more tolerant.”

Chen Hong burst out chuckling again as he continued, “There’s something you still must not know of. There was a receptionist at the front desk who really liked you. Whenever you came in, the young girl’s gaze would follow you until the elevator doors closed behind you. After the second time it happened, she was sacked. Direct orders from Mr Mu. From then on, whenever you appear in the office, no one dared to stare or look at you. It didn’t matter if they were male, female, old or young. Haha. If possible, his jealousy might even extend to everyone under the sky and even the gods. Right, I hope you can keep what we talked about today a secret. I’m afraid my job might be at risk otherwise.”

It might be a stretch for Chen Hong to say his job would be at risk. He had been working by JingYuan’s side for years. He’s as loyal as can be and he’s JingYuan’s most trusted, most capable right-hand man. JingYuan wouldn’t kick him out over something so trivial. Nevertheless, it wasn’t unlikely for the man to be suspended for a few days or have his pay cut. That’s because Mu JingYuan was jealousy incarnate.

After seeing Chen Hong out, YiHan silently returned to JingYuan’s room. Sitting there by the bed, he blankly stared as JingYuan’s gaunt face. His gaze never shifted away, not even when daylight waned.

***

When JingYuan woke up, it was night. The room was dimly lit and YiHan was nowhere to be seen. The IV drip he was hooked to had been removed and he didn’t run as hot as he did before his nap. After some proper rest, JingYuan’s head didn’t feel as heavy as it did before and his body felt much lighter. He threw his blanket aside and got to his feet. Ignoring the slippers by his feet, he pattered around, looking for YiHan. JingYuan just didn’t feel safe without the young man in his sight.

“YiHan?” JingYuan softly called out, his voice hoarse.

Then, upon hearing a soft response coming from the sofa in the room, JingYuan quickly shuffled over. He was greeted with the sight of YiHan sitting crossed-legged on the sofa as he munched on an apple. His two cheeks bulged and shifted. The younger man looked just like a hamster nibbling away. On the coffee table before him, there were the remains of an orange YiHan had consumed.

JingYuan let out a sigh of relief. “You’re hungry? Why didn’t you go get some food downstairs? Fruits aren’t enough to fill your stomach.”

YiHan’s eyes scanned the older man from top to bottom, then he frowned. “Why don’t you have your slippers on? What if you catch a cold again?”

In response, JingYuan sat down beside YiHan. He placed his feet up on the sofa too. His long legs curled up as he leaned against the back of the sofa. Then, a cough escaped his throat.

YiHan gulped down the last bits of the apple in his mouth and laid a hand against JingYuan’s forehead. “You’re finally not burning up,” YiHan sighed as his tense face relaxed. “You nearly scared me to death.”

YiHan’s brows then came back together in a frown. “Tell me,” he continued, chin tilting up in a harrumph. “Did your fever come back in full force because you also decided to walk around with bare feet this morning? You sat on the floor, slept on it and ran out into the cold after a shower?”

“I’m not a child anymore,” JingYuan protested. “Why would I do that? I was sitting on the bed the whole time.” (You did start out sitting on the bed but did you forget about slipping down to sit on the floor?)

YiHan got to his feet and grabbed a throw blanket. “You’re not a kid?” YiHan asked as he covered the other man. “Do you not even know how this fever started? Who was the man who took a shower and ran out to the windy balcony with wet hair? Who was the one who’d been sick for nearly a month?”

“I only went out to smoke a cigarette,” JingYuan argued. “I was afraid of disturbing you…”

“Was it a cigarette or a pack?” YiHan asked. “The ashtray was full and overflowing.”

JingYuan pursed his lips and said nothing.

YiHan walked to the bed and returned with JingYuan’s slippers. He knelt down before JingYuan and commanded, “Feet.”

JingYuan looked down at him in confusion.

YiHan swayed the slippers in his hands to show the man he had them. “Put on your slippers. I’m hungry. Let’s go eat. You, too, haven’t eaten anything at all. I’ve had Ms Liu cook some congee. You can have some to warm up your belly.”

JingYuan uncurled his legs and placed his feet down. YiHan slipped JingYuan’s feet into the slippers before rising to grab a thick dressing gown.

“Come, put it on and let’s go,” YiHan said, shaking the robe out.

JingYuan pursed his lips again as he silently put the dressing gown on and followed YiHan down to the dining table.

Upon seeing the two men descend, Ms Liu swiftly, and carefully, ladled a bowl full of colourful congee and carried it out of the kitchen.

“Come quick, Mr Mu,” Ms Liu said with a smile as she placed the bowl on the table. “Little Master Bai made some vegetable congee for you, all by himself! He’d put in a lot of different vegetables. It’s so nutritious. I’ve kept it on a simmer the entire time. Come try it out! It’s a sign of Little Master Bai’s love after all!”

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