25. Only Him. I Love Him
Bai XueQing’s eyes went wide. She grew up beside Mu JingYuan. She had a rough understanding of JingYuan’s social circles. Before this chat, she could never have thought someone like this existed. But after his little vent, why did it sound so much like…like her little brother? But YiHan’s a boy!
She took a big gulp of alcohol to ease the shock. After a pause, she asked, “The one you’re talking about…”
JingYuan had already voiced out his thoughts. Since the glass walls separating the world from his secret were already cracked, why not just smash it to smithereens? He squinted his eyes and replied, “You’ve already guessed who it is, haven’t you?”
XueQing’s eyes widened even further. “But Lil Bro, he’s…he’s…”
“A guy. Yes, I know,” he said with another huge gulp of liquor.
“You know yet you still…You’re gay?” XueQing asked with a frown.
“No. I only like HanHan. Only him. I love him,” JingYuan frowned back.
“Does he know your feelings?” she asked.
“If he knew, the world would’ve ended long ago from his tantrums. He would’ve chased me far away. He’s not someone who’d hesitate just for my reputation,” JingYuan replied with a bitter smile.
XueQing closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “JingYuan, HanHan had a girlfriend before. Thus, he likes girls. This isn’t an easy path. If you really love him, you shouldn’t drag him under the water,” she said.
JingYuan rested his forehand on his hands and kept silent. After a long pause, when XueQing thought he didn’t plan on speaking again, he spoke in a tone that spoke of pain and suffering. “I know. I thought about that too. If he…As long as there’s hope, no matter how small, I won’t give up. But reality now shows he likes girls. I won’t…I won’t hurt him. Don’t worry. I’m just thinking. I want to stay by his side. Even if it’s just as a family friend, I want to watch over him, protect him. As long as he’s willing to stay close to me and not hate me. It’s enough. But for some unknown reason, he’s angry at me. He won’t even see me.”
XueQing lifted the liquor bottle from the table and took a deep swig. Her body slouched back against the couch. The two went silent. Then, she suddenly spoke up. “If you just want to be his family, then I have a plan.”
He opened his eyes and looked at her. “What plan?” he asked.
“Marry me,” she replied with fire in her eyes.
“Are you mad?” he yelped in shock.
“I’m not,” she said, “Marry me and you’ll be his brother-in-law. Then you can protect him for his entire life without any problems.”
“You should know that this involves biggest event of a human’s life. Not only mine, but yours too. How can you fool around with that? No matter how much I want to stay close to HanHan, I won’t have it cost you your life’s happiness,” he solemnly replied.
XueQing’s eyes bore down into JingYuan. “JingYuan, I like you. You must’ve sensed it, because you’ve been avoiding me lately. Isn’t that so? I’m that kind of person. If I like something, I’ll do my very best to fight for it. You want to protect HanHan. I want you. Our marriage will give us both what we want. Yes?” she said despondently.
“XueQing, you must understand. Your liking is just vague positive feelings for me. You are the daughter of the Bai family. You can have anyone you want. You know who my heart belongs to now. If you marry me, you’ll never be happy,” he said.
“Who knows what’ll happen in the future? We’re still young. A lifetime is a long time. Living together day after day. How do you know you will never be moved by me? If I can wait for that day, I would’ve succeeded. If that day doesn’t come or if I end up liking someone else, we’ll break up in good terms. We’ll still be friends. You would’ve stayed by HanHan’s side as family for far longer. There’d be nothing wrong for you to continue staying by his side then, right?” XueQing said.